poem, a litte dark |
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poem, a litte dark |
Mar 24 2005, 10:57 AM
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#1
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![]() rockstar ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 54 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 34,140 |
let me know what you think
eating away from the inside my walls are being torn down a renivation of the soul painful scars revealed the front i put up daily now becoming transparent exposing the battle of who i should be who i professe to be what i want to be and who i am all in a condradiction to eachother a different story for each day a quick fix here and there a life fully of temporary happy soon overshadowed by lifes daily downfalls a fall of hope a fall of faith for i know where to grasp hold to save myself and soul but i dont hold on i let my self go falling into what appears to be another life how i act depending on the time or situation living to please, forgetting to please myself pulled from reality into what i would like to call my fantasy by the consequences are real and there is far worse to come unless i turn around which as easy as it seems come at a price far too high for me to bear so i stay stay in what some call hell, some call home facing each day a personal trial a lock on my emotional being my soul struggles to breath the fresh air of a free life of one i can shrug the shackles of the world ive created to which it can easily grasp but i wont let it so all this saying ive given birth to my destiny but the truth calls clearly the last question left upond my weary mind a far from my dieing inspiration do i answer it? |
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Mar 24 2005, 11:14 AM
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#2
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![]() Another ditch in the road... you keep moving ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 6,281 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 85,152 |
i really like it!
some of the lines run a little long and it throws the rhythm a bit, but thats my only minor criticism |
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Mar 24 2005, 12:24 PM
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#3
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![]() i just want BANG BANG BANG ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 252 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 113,855 |
awesome =] i love writing stuff like that.
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Mar 24 2005, 01:47 PM
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#4
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![]() ... ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 818 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 32,366 |
wow thats really good
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