My dad, I hate him, yet, I don't Options

[xj_liana_tx]

my dad is similar to your dad, dads like ours want to be proud of us, yet because of their traditions (i am guessing you are chinese), they keep out all the bragging. they have high expectations because they invested so much in us, and they yell at us on the smallest thing and doesn't praise us on our achievements because they want us to improve constantly and not let their hopes up.
i know what you mean.
it will be all better when we get in to good colleges or get a good job that pays a lot.

[sm0kinm0nky]

yeah thats like my dad, my dad never went to my school/band concerts, sports games, recitials, and we barely talk and my parents are divoreced.

his nightjob messes up alota stuff.

[ichiban]

Tell him you dont appreciate him bitching at you all the time and he should be more supportive.

[xourzest]

omfg my dad's like that to and he starts swearing and he hits me on the face, leg, arm, butt..ect and ur mother is dead?if he said along wit ur mother that would hurt me so much if my mother was dead...i totaly understand what u feel like

[Shattered_Hope]

I'm sorry but my dad isn't all that great either...he's not there for me...or someone who I would count on to be there for me...but I guess he's ok...it's not like he's that mean in front of me..or yell or stuff like that alot.

[jordanriane]

If you lost your mom, maybe you remind him alot of her, and honestly, he probably misses her, and you're a reminder of her to him, so in order to banish those feelings, he just rants at you and whatnot.

Write your dad a letter, telling hiim how he treats you really upsets you, and leaves you hurt. I'm sure it'll be better to do that, then to tell him to his face, it might be easier on you and whatnot.

[jordanriane]

If you lost your mom, maybe you remind him alot of her, and honestly, he probably misses her, and you're a reminder of her to him, so in order to banish those feelings, he just rants at you and whatnot.

Write your dad a letter, telling hiim how he treats you really upsets you, and leaves you hurt. I'm sure it'll be better to do that, then to tell him to his face, it might be easier on you and whatnot.

[SSJ Kenshin]

Alas, I too have had problems with my father, but through communication, the two of us have patched some of the major holes in our relationship. Maybe it will help you too.

[Just_Dream]

Yea well.. my father never showed me "love" either. In fact, he's what's been tearing my family apart, imo. That's pretty much why my half sisters and half brother live so far away. My father's caused a lot of problems, so at least your relationship with your father isn't so bad to the point where you argue with your father he hits you when you're 12-13 years old. My father showed me the oppsite of love. He showed me hate. Even though your father may not be around, deep down maybe he truly does want to, but is really busy. Try to talk to him and find a time when you two can do some father-daughter bonding.

[toodlepops.]

I'm so sorry.
Maybe when you see your dad in a good mood, you should go and talk to him. Maybe sometimes you should go and say, " Dad, I Love You" and give him a hug. He'll really appreciate that. ;)

[_lub_u_]

[omG! im in the same situation as u and stuff. i know how u feel. he yells at me and my brother and makes it seem like we do everything wrong. He spazzes at me for not remembering to turn off the light when he always doesnt. He makes a big deal out of something really small and akes it looks like tis the end of the world. He says that the house is a huge mess when he just sits there, complaining. HE always says that he's tired and tells me to do all the house work when he just sat there wtaching tv for the whole day. I mean its not my fault his life is so crappy ad he has to take his anger out on me. Its not my fault that he takes drugs and has bad health. It's not my fault that he and my mom married , had sex and gave birth to me.

Sometimes i jsut wish that my dad wasnt my dad and i would have a much nicer dad...or maybe my mom would just take us away and have a new life. I am so pissed off at my dad i could kill him if i could grrrr

[Teesa]

aw, sorry about your tough situation..it's going to be difficult, but you and your dad need to do some MAJOR talking with each other. If you two don't put your feelings out on the table, then this horrible relationship will keep going on, which makes everything worse.

[xXirockhardXx]

Im sorry you have to go threw that. I think you should sit him down and talk to him about how he makes you feel. I dont think you should be taking crap from him...

[ohBrian]

hey i feel you..

youre lucky to have your dad while u were growing up ..

i grew up with my mom and raised by her.

i lived with him when i was 12 not im 17

its really hard, but yea they say i understand his situation, its hard to be a father.

[audory]

oh man. i'm so sorry to hear that. talk it over with him. if that was my dad, i'd b*tch at him and like run away from home... but the things i do never get me anywhere so just talk? hope it helps.

[aznmonkeypunk]

i think you should just say "f**k you" and leave him because he is being a faggot for treating his own daughter like that.

[xiaobing]

So, I was told that when I was little, my dad never held me like a "normal" father should. Sure, he gives me everything that I need : Food, a roof over my head and some shopping trips from time to time. But there's one thing missing; love. He's never EVER said the worlds, "I love you" or has even hugged me. He yells at me constantly and says things like, "I wish you were dead along with your mother." I KNOW he doesnt mean it..But still. It huirts. Also, I just joined track this year as a freshman and my uncles and aunts think I'll do a good job. But then there's my dad on the other side saying, "Oh no. She'll never place in any of her events." Or, "She's not good at running, trust me. I've seen her." WTF? He's NEVER come to any of my Pointe ballet recitals or dance competitions, nor has he even seen me run.
I don't want sympathy, I just want to know what I should say to him so I won't lose another parent.

Hey u chines or AZN right cuz i checkd yr Xanga. Well if ure chinese or Azn or w/e dey usually say dat cuz dey dunno how to encourage their kids. They dink dat if dey say dat ure not good at it den u'll try harder but sum pppl just quit. I dont tho. Yeh dads usualy dont hold dere kids. N dey dont usually dont go up to their kids N say I LOve U so . Wen sumthn bad happnds 2 u lik if ure in a car crash or sumthn den the first ding thy'll do is come runnin to u N lik say how sry dey R. Well Lataz!!! Leave comment on ma Xanga aight MY XANGA

[swe3ttemptasian]

aww, this makes me want to cry..

[*mona lisa*]

my dad doesn't show much love either. never hugged unless you count the first day i saw him when i was six. he's always yelling at me for some reason over stupid stuff. but, it's not as bad as yours. i don't know, but maybe your dad still isn't over the fact that your mother died. but you should talk to him. get real emotional, and he will realize how wrong he is in what he's doing.

[l_baybeexgrl_l]

yeah, i understand where you're coming from. my dad never said 'i love you' unless he was really drunk. gah he seems like he doesnt care and just goes out and does whatever, doesn't think how much it affects us in the end. he doesn't support me in the things i do. but i guess im starting to get used to it. thats y i dont go to him for anything.

hopefully things will work out for the both of you, just sit down and talk. if that doesnt work, there's gotta be another way?

[Wolverine0723]

I fell sorry, for you, I knida know what you feel... when I was 7, my parents got divorsed 'cuz he was abusing me and my mother... he would slap me when he was mad, to "get rid of" his stress... then he would brake my "invetions" (lol...like the thingas you would make from nothing)... and commited adultry on my mother... I think of him now as a sicko, a**hole, bi***h,...you know what I mean.

[heyyfrankie]

maybe that is how he was treated whenever he was a youngster! that may be the only way of growing that he knows and he feels like he is doing the "normal" thing. just try to talk to him and if that doesn't work, you can try talking to one of your aunts or uncles and they will probably help you work through this. good luck!!!

[xvi3tbuddyx]

. how sad. that doesnt happen to meeh. my dad relaly wubs meeh......well u should just sit down, get him a cup of tea/coffee.....n have a lito chit chat wib him......itll work....trust meeeh....if it doesnt work....kill meeh!

[Jennilicious23]

you should definately talk to him about it. If you keep it to yourself you'll just get angrier. My dad has a gambling problem and lectures me constantly. so I know where you're coming from.

[IamRad]

just randomly tell him u love him

my dad has never said it but hes hugged me before