poem, what do u think |
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 Mar 11 2005, 09:47 PM
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#1
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 Senior Member  Group: Member Posts: 46 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 78,732  |
hm one of my firends wrote this i think its amazing shes 13 one of my best friends tell me wut u think bout it
World of Pretend For the people who can no longer handle reality Let me stay In my world of pretend Where nothing is broken There's nothing to mend Don't bring me back To your reality Don't make me face The cruelty of life Let me stay In my dreams Where I can't hear My own silent screams Leave me here In my haven Where I seek What was taken Let me stay In my world of pretend Sayrah Elizabeth Gilbert Copyright ©2005 Sayrah Elizabeth Gilbert  very talented i think shes workin on a book right now to shes also gettin another poem published.
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Mar 11 2005, 09:49 PM
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#2
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 dripping destruction Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,282 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 21,929 |
sounds good.
there is a writing section you know... in interests. |
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| *Azarel* |
Mar 11 2005, 09:49 PM
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#3
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Guest |
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| *salcha* |
Mar 11 2005, 09:50 PM
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#4
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Guest |
this should be in writing.
but great poem, im not always in reality. |
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Mar 11 2005, 09:51 PM
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#5
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 46 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 78,732 |
well how am i supposed to move it is there a way i do it? lol or can sum1 do it for me
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Mar 11 2005, 09:54 PM
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#6
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 rwar (; Group: Member Posts: 590 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,308 |
you cant move it, one of the staff people will.
jst try not to do it again =] |
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Mar 11 2005, 10:00 PM
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#7
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 whaaaaaaat? Group: Member Posts: 2,293 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,660 |
someone will move this eventually. please, post in the right forums. shanks.
not bad. i wrote a poem for some contest thing in freshie year cause my teacher made our class enter at least one contest. now its published in some book. oh who gives a rat's ass. |
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Mar 11 2005, 10:05 PM
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#8
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 46 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 78,732 |
lol thats pretty cool well i looked for sumwhere to put it but i couldnt find it i didnt look long enough lol or im jsut stupid idk sowwy
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Mar 11 2005, 10:08 PM
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#9
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 I have no life Group: Member Posts: 1,119 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 66,675 |
Some staff member better move this to writing..
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Mar 11 2005, 10:09 PM
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#10
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 aNNa BaNaNa >.< Group: Member Posts: 102 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 104,244 |
aww i like it... thats how I feel myself at times, to be away from all the things that bring me down. Tell her she has GREAT talent!! >.<
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Mar 11 2005, 10:29 PM
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#11
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 My name's Katt. Nice to meet you! Group: Member Posts: 3,826 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,674 |
I like the concept. But the rhyming is kind of weird because she doesn't really have a specific pattern so the flow isn't so good. I like it though and I can relate. Good luck to her.
PS. You can see some of my own poems in the writing section. Like everyone else said, you'll get more people to post if you post there. It's specifically for writing. How convenient is that? 
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Mar 11 2005, 10:42 PM
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#12
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 whatever d00de Group: Member Posts: 1,349 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 63,060 |
it's really nice. i like it.
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Mar 11 2005, 10:45 PM
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#13
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 ART is everything. Group: Member Posts: 230 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 45,166 |
fab. I like it a lot. =]
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Mar 11 2005, 10:48 PM
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#14
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 insanitys contagious. Group: Official Member Posts: 4,210 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 99,707 |
QUOTE(sadolakced acid @ Mar 11 2005, 10:49 PM) sounds good. there is a writing section you know... in interests.  yessss. |
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Mar 11 2005, 11:15 PM
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#15
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 46 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 78,732 |
not to be rude but for the like 7th time...yes i know
lol everybody is posting that i cna read  lol sry
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Mar 13 2005, 03:12 AM
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#16
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 Live Your Own Party Group: Member Posts: 1,261 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 7,489 |
I think it's really really good.
In some places it's a bit choppy and the flow isn't too potent, but, besides that, it's really great. 
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