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*A girls firs time*, lol
HongKongDong
post Mar 4 2005, 09:17 PM
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Lol oops... supposed to be "first" but yeah you get it x]

I did try searching for this and came up with nothing so yeah.... >.<

I'm pretty sure most of you have read this before 'cuz its kinda old lol and im bored so yeah =/

*A Girls First Time*

(Assume you are a girl if you are a boy)



It's your first time. As you lie back your

muscles tighten. You put him

off for a while searching for an excuse, but he

refuses to be swayed as he

approaches you. He asks if you're afraid and you

shake your head bravely.

He has had more experience, but it's the first

time his finger has found

the right place. He probes deeply and you shiver;

your body tenses; but

he's gentle like he promised he'd be. He looks

deeply within your eyes

and tells you to trust him - he's done this many

times before. His cool

smile relaxes you and you open wider to give him

;more room for an easy

entrance.You begin to plead and beg him to hurry,

but he slowly takes his

time, wanting to cause you as little pain as

possible. As he presses

;closer, going deeper, you feel the tissue give

way; pain surges throughout

your body and you feel the slight trickle of

blood as he continues. He

looks at you concerned and asks you if it's too

painful.Your eyes are

filled with tears but you shake your head and nod

for him to go on. He

begins going in and out with skill but you are

now too numb to feel him

within you. After a few moments, you feel

something bursting within you and

he pulls it out of you, you lay panting, glad to

have it over. He looks

at you and smiling warmly, tells you, with a

chuckle; that you have been

his most stubborn yet most rewarding experience.

You smile and thank your

dentist. After all, it was your first time to have

a tooth pulled.







Naughty, Naughty!

What were you thinkin' ?

PERVERT

I know what you were thinking!
 
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123Shot
post Mar 4 2005, 09:30 PM
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LOL..uhh i think u can guess what i was thinkin about...hehe...
 
kandiapplegrl
post Mar 4 2005, 09:38 PM
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...old.
 
HongKongDong
post Mar 4 2005, 09:39 PM
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^^Please read the whole post.. I already said that most of you must have already read it because it is old.. -.-
 
kandiapplegrl
post Mar 4 2005, 09:42 PM
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i didn't intend for you to take it in a mean way. for that i apologize.
 
HongKongDong
post Mar 4 2005, 09:44 PM
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^^ I didn't take it in a mean way... you just have to follow the rules ^^ and I was implying that... well its what I was trying to do xD
 
*wind&fire*
post Mar 4 2005, 09:45 PM
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it has been posted before... but yes i was thinking out sex...
 
tofuburger
post Mar 6 2005, 02:04 AM
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hold up..lemme read that again -.-;;;
 
d0rkbaby
post Mar 6 2005, 02:24 AM
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i'm a d0rk =)
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QUOTE(wind&fire @ Mar 4 2005, 7:45 PM)
but yes i was thinking out sex...
*

^ haha so was i =P
yea i know i have dirty mind.
 
the_crox
post Mar 6 2005, 04:09 AM
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she doesn't even know
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also i was thinking of sex.
 
freeflow
post Mar 6 2005, 04:32 AM
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hhahahhahaha i was thinking of sex too .. lolz
 
cocoalightning27
post Mar 6 2005, 10:20 AM
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I have no life
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now really, who didn't read the joke before and was not thinking about sex?........
 
Trolling
post Mar 6 2005, 10:22 AM
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I think who ever dosent think of sex reading it is not normal... That sounded like a porno 0.0
 
nevernothere
post Mar 6 2005, 10:28 AM
Post #14


the Ray... it filters through
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Well c'mon.. you MADE us think that way. Good joke though.
 
lakerfever2476
post Mar 7 2005, 02:37 PM
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That joke is so perverted !! =)
 
shortiiex
post Mar 7 2005, 04:18 PM
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i think this was already posted..but oh wells

what a dirty mind i have
 
aznxdreamer
post Mar 7 2005, 06:04 PM
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to hell with you
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this has been posted a couple of times already
 
SMUSHiENESS
post Mar 7 2005, 09:50 PM
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lols. there are alot of diffrent versions of that (: but i thihnk i like this one the best.
 
with_time_it_fad...
post Mar 7 2005, 09:52 PM
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the first time i read that i was like what in the world. and then when i finished i was cracking up
 
danishcookiez
post Mar 8 2005, 09:59 PM
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iuvenesco
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hahaha, that story always cracks me up.
 
FireArrow
post Mar 8 2005, 11:43 PM
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Mhm.. I was thinking of dentist all along... =)...
 
*salcha*
post Mar 8 2005, 11:54 PM
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haah i got this before,
first time i read it though, i was like: oh, shoot...
 
5ayuri
post Mar 9 2005, 08:54 PM
Post #23


Too slow.
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ive seen that one soo long ago..like 2 years maybe..yup and i was thinking..that
 
lilphoenix
post Mar 11 2005, 01:40 PM
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I'm just a little bit crazy...
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Heard it.
 
to-devastate
post Mar 11 2005, 04:54 PM
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highfive.
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ah, im a dirty girl. tongue.gif
 

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