My dad, I hate him, yet, I don't |
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 Mar 5 2005, 11:47 PM
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#1
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 omgah_itsmaggiex=new username.  Group: Member Posts: 785 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 21,467  |
So, I was told that when I was little, my dad never held me like a "normal" father should. Sure, he gives me everything that I need : Food, a roof over my head and some shopping trips from time to time. But there's one thing missing; love. He's never EVER said the worlds, "I love you" or has even hugged me. He yells at me constantly and says things like, "I wish you were dead along with your mother." I KNOW he doesnt mean it..But still. It huirts. Also, I just joined track this year as a freshman and my uncles and aunts think I'll do a good job. But then there's my dad on the other side saying, "Oh no. She'll never place in any of her events." Or, "She's not good at running, trust me. I've seen her." WTF? He's NEVER come to any of my Pointe ballet recitals or dance competitions, nor has he even seen me run.
I don't want sympathy, I just want to know what I should say to him so I won't lose another parent. |
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Mar 6 2005, 12:24 AM
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#2
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 Member Group: Member Posts: 17 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 5,123 |
just talk to him and tell him how you feel. i have probs w/ my dad too and the best thing to do, i think would to just talk to him. tell him what he's doing to you because he might not be seeing it. if you're not sure exactly what to say or if ur scared to talk to him, maybe go to a relative, ur aunt or uncle, and ask them for advice. or maybe they could talk to him for you and help you out. good luck
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Mar 6 2005, 12:47 AM
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#3
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 You can't keep running from what you're trying to find. Group: Official Member Posts: 5,030 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 54,096 |
o... wow. sorry
 my dad always shows his love, so i can't really relate to you  i'm not sure if this is true, but from all these books i've read, maybe you just remind your dad of your mom so much he's hurt whenever he looks at you (possibly) or maybe he's just not a loving person... maybe go to therapy? or a school counselor... they could help  hope it works out!   
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Mar 6 2005, 01:09 AM
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#4
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 Hi! I'm Dani :) Group: Member Posts: 5,637 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,369 |
wow. thats really harsh. if i were u i would b*tch at my dad about how i feel but i suggest u dont do that
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Mar 6 2005, 01:14 AM
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#5
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 ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,309 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 65,593 |
same here i hate my dad..but yet he is my dad..and i do like him a little. =\
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Mar 6 2005, 02:03 AM
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#6
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 iMmA reAl gUrL Group: Member Posts: 73 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 68,191 |
just deal with it .... everyone has problems with ple
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Mar 6 2005, 03:34 AM
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#7
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 she doesn't even know Group: Member Posts: 501 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 72,065 |
yeah.... go talk to him.
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Mar 6 2005, 04:09 AM
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#8
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 Apr 24 '05* 1000 posts! Group: Member Posts: 1,184 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 56,049 |
did ur mom pass away or smth? maybe he's just sad over her...
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Mar 6 2005, 04:14 AM
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#9
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gigi =p Group: Member Posts: 3,679 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 41,206 |
He should probably go see a counsellor or psychiatrist, because obviously he's gone through some pretty bad ordeals and became what he is today. That's not to say these counsellors will "cure" him at all...you should talk to him about it directly first.
Good luck. =] |
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Mar 6 2005, 09:24 AM
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#10
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 go go power rangers<3 Group: Member Posts: 321 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 76,457 |
I have tons of problems with my dad, too. I'm going to a therapist and he's helping me sort out my feelings, and helping me learn to express them better too. Maybe you should try to find one.
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Mar 6 2005, 09:49 AM
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#11
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 Ah, mon Dieu ! Group: Member Posts: 2,274 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,587 |
i'm sorry you have to go through that...
but my dad used to be te same... always verbal abusing me, saying bs, being mean to me, never telling me that he loved me... i was in the same situation as you are in now... but when my mom left him and took me with her, he started to realize that he had been treating me wrong... so i don't know how you'd do it, but make your dad realize that he still loves you and should be showig his affections for you... good luck. |
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Mar 6 2005, 12:30 PM
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#12
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 1000 Words..Have Never Been Spoken Group: Member Posts: 101 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,204 |
oh my gosh..that's horrible T.T i'm so sorry! tell him that you need more love from him, and tell him that u love him too =/ i hope it helpz
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Mar 6 2005, 01:50 PM
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#13
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 Class of 2005!!! Group: Member Posts: 1,132 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,080 |
I know how you feel. My dad is the same way. I can never do anything right. He screams at me. He b*tches and whines that the house isn't clean enough, yet he doesn't lift a finger. He doesn't help me watch the kids. GRR! I mean, I hate him, and I say that I wouldn't care if he was dead, but when its like snowy and icey, and I think hes in a wreck, I get scared, and I'm scared that he was in a wreck. I mean, I'm not completely heartless
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Mar 6 2005, 01:56 PM
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#14
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 726 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 95,137 |
you should tell him how you feel. by doing that, maybe you'll get closer because he'll get to know how you actually feel about him. then maybe he can talk to you more about how he feels about you and get the whole thing settled.
in short: just talk to him about it. |
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Mar 6 2005, 08:42 PM
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#15
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s w e e t e s t Group: Member Posts: 808 Joined: Sep 2004 Member No: 46,149 |
i think you should tell your dad about your feeling. you should actually. x]
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Mar 6 2005, 08:43 PM
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#16
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 mS diAna Group: Member Posts: 468 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 11,262 |
. . . . kinda reminds me of my dad =\
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Mar 6 2005, 09:32 PM
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#17
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 I'll never be who I was again.. Group: Member Posts: 2,886 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 77,981 |
thats how my dad acts...well he used to...u should talk to him and try to better know him...do u tell him u love him no matter what?maybe he loves u inside but has a hard time saying that...my dad was like that so i kinda understand what u mean..
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Mar 6 2005, 09:54 PM
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#18
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 Je vous aime Group: Member Posts: 361 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 109,078 |
Well.. I think you should talk to your other relitives and get them to talk to him.
I mean.. telling your daughter that you wish she was dead.. Even if he doesnt mean it thats like some seriouse stuff! |
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Mar 6 2005, 09:55 PM
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#19
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 Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 6,953 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 52,702 |
talking to him might help...but sometimes ppl don't change
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Mar 7 2005, 02:17 PM
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#20
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 <3<3<3<3 Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 3,177 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,779 |
moved to relationships
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Mar 7 2005, 04:04 PM
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#21
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gRaCiE Group: Member Posts: 350 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 96,997 |
first try talking to him urself n then take it outside of the two of u if it doesnt work. ur relative u know? if that still doesnt work u need to see a counsler n maybe even get therapy for ur relationship
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Mar 7 2005, 05:21 PM
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#22
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 558 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 102,872 |
Thats how my dad is.
Only I dont like my dad at all. I hope he dies and burns in hell. (& he will eventually.) |
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Mar 7 2005, 05:27 PM
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#23
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 4,357 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 28,115 |
Spend more time with him.
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Mar 7 2005, 06:07 PM
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#24
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 499 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 109,961 |
OMG?!?!?!...I think that you should tell of your dad...I would especially if my dad was like that...and then put the song "Perfect" by Simple Plan...on your CD player the loudest it can get...and if he listens and understands it...then I think you'll get that talk...and when he says it does he say it mean or does he say it like jokely cause there is a big difference but still...maybe he's not a dad maybe hes a father cuz..a dad is someone who can say I love you to there own daughter...omg?!?!..wtf?!?!...he needs some help or ya'll juss need to talk!!...
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Mar 7 2005, 06:12 PM
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#25
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watch out for jellyfish. Group: Member Posts: 174 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 31,672 |
nothing`s worked for me, im in the same situation as you. ):
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