Forbidden Love, Advice please!? Options

[Matsumoto]

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[rainnydaiis]

First of all the all he wants is Sex is acutally a great matter... Anyways you say you love him so you know what can you do. Love is such a complicated feeling... What happened in my situation was I had a serious talk with my parents and how I can work it out. If its really love people say you do crazy things for it so why not be crazy and talk to your parents and tell Matt that you love him... Well thats just my opinion and if you decide to do that good luck!

[hockeyav]

I know I'm new here, but just hear me out.

I think it would be pointless to talk to your parents about how you really feel about Matt right now. At this stage whatever you tell your parents isn't going to change anything between you and Matt.

Also if your serious about getting back together with Matt you should break it off with your current boyfriend. Matt is definitly not going to try to come back while your dating someone else.

Try to talk to some of his friends if you can. Since you're a few years younger you probably don't mix as well with other Seniors, but by seeing how his friends treat you can tell a lot about what he tells his friends about you.

The most important thing you can do is to talk to Matt. When I say talk, I mean to really talk. Have a conversation where you say everything to him about how you feel, and depending on how the conversation goes on where you want to go from there. Make sure he understands what you're saying.

And maybe the best thing, and hardest thing to do would be to just wait, and see how things go as time goes on.


-hockeyav

[topsyturvy]

^ Agree with everything hockeyav said.

hockeyav, you'd make a great counsellor.

[_sarcastic_]

I know I'm new here, but just hear me out.

I think it would be pointless to talk to your parents about how you really feel about Matt right now. At this stage whatever you tell your parents isn't going to change anything between you and Matt.

Also if your serious about getting back together with Matt you should break it off with your current boyfriend. Matt is definitly not going to try to come back while your dating someone else.

Try to talk to some of his friends if you can. Since you're a few years younger you probably don't mix as well with other Seniors, but by seeing how his friends treat you can tell a lot about what he tells his friends about you.

The most important thing you can do is to talk to Matt. When I say talk, I mean to really talk. Have a conversation where you say everything to him about how you feel, and depending on how the conversation goes on where you want to go from there. Make sure he understands what you're saying.

And maybe the best thing, and hardest thing to do would be to just wait, and see how things go as time goes on.
-hockeyav

i agree.

[perfectxflaw23]

I don't understand why you're still with Chris if he made you realize that you love Matt. I wouldn't appreciate Matt being with someone else, but I don't know him. Maybe he's not the type that you can expect to completely wait around for you. I doubt talking to your parents would help. Unless they have some trust in you again, it's pointless. But if they do try telling them things that would help them be more comfortable (make sure that it's the TRUTH). And if the things you're going to do with Matt won't make them comfortable, then you probably have no chance of being with him while in their house.

My friend is similar to this. Only her parents made her stop seeing him because she was pregnant, when he had just graduated and had a great job that could have supported the baby. But they forced her to have an abortion. So now she's in therapy with me because of all that. I feel bad for her. Her parents took away her cell phone, she can't go anywhere alone. She even has a babysitter. She does see him every couple months, and he is waiting for her. But her parents truly are messed up (our group psychologist has met with them). Anyway, you're in a tough situation, and only you can possibly know how to best handle your parents and emotions.

Whew.

[DanielleMaria05]

First off, I don't want to make you mad, but I think you already lost Matt if he is with someone else, and he doesn't even attempt to talk to you.

You really shouldn't have told your parents a lie. That is proably where they get the idea that all he wants is sex, that you said you were going one place and ended up somewhere diff, they are afraid that you will have sex with him, espically since he has his own car, and can go wherever he wants without parental supervistion. I guess you'll just haev to sort this out with your parents, and Matt. Just talk to them.

[starlette]

uhh...ur parents are dumb. 2 years is nothing. Theres a girl on here whos messin around with a guy whos 9 years older than her. tell your parents that they cannot expect for you to go to a school with people older and younger then you but for you to date those only your age. shoot. I say if they are within the age that you could have gone to high school with them, you are safe. Ie 13 and 15, not okay, but 15 and 17 okay. I mean seriously. No law bbreaking... its only 2 years. In two years, if you date a person 2 years younger than you are u only dating them for sex? rediculous. Okay. I'm sorry for ranting about ur parents, but seriously, tell them at least hes not some college graduate! Make them realise that it could be a lot worse. In fact, do what my friend did. Her mom freaked out at her for something like this... (funny cuz her moms a total whore and works weekends as a dominatrix..I hate hypocrites) She was dating a guy 2 years older, and she grounded her til she stopped seeing him. so she went thru her older sister (by older i mean 6 years) and got her to get one of her friends to pretend they were dating. She told her mom alllll about it and was like, oh yeah, they drink and go to frat parties all the time, hes even graduating college next year! bla bla bla. then her mom was like what ever happened to that other boy. shes like, the one u sais I couldnt see? And her moms like yeah, why dont you at least date someone who goes to the same school as you. And that was the end of that. :D So, if ur ballsy, try that approach. And by the way, if u were in love with him, did he return the feelings? And how serious is this guy with his new girlfriend? dont go breakin up somethin good for him just cuz u want him back now ya hear? hehe. good luck girl, I hope this helps.

[fundipper]

my parents are somewhat like urs. they hate my bf, just because he's not a christian, which i'm really not either, but they think i am, whatever, its lame. and he's only a year older than me, and i'm 18 years old for goodness sake!!! But you really just need to make sure u'r evaluating the relationship carefully to see if its worth going up against ur parents. then, stick to ur guns.

[EmmalieV]

I know I'm new here, but just hear me out.

I think it would be pointless to talk to your parents about how you really feel about Matt right now. At this stage whatever you tell your parents isn't going to change anything between you and Matt.

Also if your serious about getting back together with Matt you should break it off with your current boyfriend. Matt is definitly not going to try to come back while your dating someone else.

Try to talk to some of his friends if you can. Since you're a few years younger you probably don't mix as well with other Seniors, but by seeing how his friends treat you can tell a lot about what he tells his friends about you.

The most important thing you can do is to talk to Matt. When I say talk, I mean to really talk. Have a conversation where you say everything to him about how you feel, and depending on how the conversation goes on where you want to go from there. Make sure he understands what you're saying.

And maybe the best thing, and hardest thing to do would be to just wait, and see how things go as time goes on.
-hockeyav

âgreed.

[syaoronsangel]

Okay, first of all, your parents are not overracting to the fact that you said you were going somewhere and totally went somewhere else. That ruin their trust for you. Um, you shouldn't have dated Chris unless you already broke up with Matt? Even if you did break up with Matt you should have waited until you totally got over him and then went out with Chris.

[xj_liana_tx]

don't tell your parents about him, you can still date without going out.
it's better that way than not going out at all.

[leeniex3]

well just like xj_liana_tx said you dont need to tell them that your going out but you know it is true what your parents said .. about him only wanting sex and you did sort of "lose" their trust by lying to them about where you were going. He isn't the only guy out there .. if he really loved you like you love him then he'd come back wouldnt he? so either you can just wait or you can go find yourself another true lover (; we all still have time so why rush it? It's not always that great to have a boyfriend/girlfriend.