he's 26..., ... and i'm 17 Options

[Haruka]

ok i'll try to make this as short as i can, but i'll elaborate more later.

i've known this guy for about 3-4 years, but when i first met him i didn't ever think about going out with him. He lived in my house b/c he didn't have papers and needed some where to live until he had a job. Then he moved out after a few months and after that i went to live in another country for about 2 years.

My mother talked to him when he was living with me and it turns out he's my great grandmother's decendant so he's like barly my cousin or wut ever relation he would have with me, but i still call him my "cousin"

Ok so now i'm much older, more developed and he sees me again after 2 years and he thinks i'm hot and he thinks i'm so mature for my age and is pissed off that i'm not older. he tells me that he loves me and he wants to live with me, and take care of me

One day we had a get together of my bro's and my friends and at almost the end of the night when i was full of wine coolers and shots of singani (and so is he) he starts to kiss me, and i like it, i let him. but then i get scared, because my brother's right behind us with two other people looking at pics on the computer, thier backs to us (they can't see us)

We start making out a bit then we stop b/c my bro and his friends start talking to us again.

then about 2 weeks later we have another gathering of friends, we drink and at the end of the night i'm drunk like hell (more than i have ever been) and we make out some more, but he starts doing other non pg-13 things to me (but i'm still a virgin) and my brother calls me upstairs and i don't see him for the rest of the night.

ok so what's the problem, you ask?
he's 26 and i'm 17
and everyone thinks he's my "cousin"
and not to mention if he EVER breaks my heart, then my bro and his friends will beat the living @#$@# out of him (but they are just tooooo over protective)

any advice?

[topsyturvy]

ok so what's the problem, you ask?
he's 26 and i'm 17
and everyone thinks he's my "cousin"
and not to mention if he EVER breaks my heart, then my bro and his friends will beat the living @#$@# out of him (but they are just tooooo over protective)

Actually, age really shouldn't stop you guys from getting in a relationship. The problem isn't your ages. It's whether you're ready or not.

It doesn't matter if everyone thinks you're cousins or whatever. Although technically you are..

It's a good thing your bro and his friends are like that. You have back-up and protection IF he ever does anything to you. After all, he's 9 years older. You never know what older men might do. i know i'm being hypocritical about age, but hear me out. My point for you is.. just be careful. Although you shouldn't be too worried since he can be considered an old family friend.. You parents know him, right?

[starlette]

sweetie, not to judge, but hes taking advantage of you. when I was about 12, I knew girls who were dating guys 9 years older than them, and I continue to see it now when I'm 19. Men know that younger girls will feel special when they pay attention. They know that an older guy makes a girl think saftey. So they trust them, and do a lot more with them. And guys like tight p**** Please. I'm asking you to be smart about this. If hes so great, couldnt he get girls his own age? 26 years old is an entirely different level. I just don't think its wise that you go that route. Thats just my humble opinion, but older guys are stronger and meaner too. they are capable of more damage, and u could really get yourself hurt. I suggest you find someone within about 3 years of your age. I wont hardly date anyone much older than me than that. just be safe and careful. when it comes down to it, its your body, and your life. Just choose wisely, cuz this is the only chance u get with it.

[yeseulx3]

what if you get raped?

- -;

[_sarcastic_]

when it comes to this kind of things, you've gotta be really careful
yeah, age doesn't really matter in a relationship, but he is already 26, he would know more about those 'stuff' than you would, like what karamelle said, if he's so great, why isn't he will someone within his age range.
just make a wise decision so you won't regret it later

[topsyturvy]

The thing is, guys, this 26-year-old dude has been staying in her house before, so most likely her parents know him. Do they approve though?

[whomps]

Wow.. he thinks your hot now just from two years? You seem kinda easy. You knew this guy from 3-4 years but you only lived and actually KNEW him for a couple of months until he moved out. You were 15, he was.. 24?!
I know age doesn't matter but this guy isn't being true to you.
It seems like he only loves you because of your looks or something. How can you love someone when you.. don't even.. take the time to know him?

It's weird. You guys have a cousinly relationship and then you guys start making out and doing explicit things. Haha.. he's your.. cousin. Haha!

[runforfun529]

My mother talked to him when he was living with me and it turns out he's my great grandmother's decendant so he's like barly my cousin or wut ever relation he would have with me, but i still call him my "cousin"

Wait, so he's related to you and you are doing "non PG-13" things with him. Thats a little gross if you ask me. I would puke if I found out my ex was related to me because of some of the stuff we've done.


lol 500th post

This post has been edited by runforfun529: Mar 2 2005, 08:08 AM

[Fatality]

Be careful hun.
He's a lot older than you and older guys prey on younger girls.
They have heard girls convo's and seen them walk and act.
He knows that there look for and wanting.
He can be saying all the right things and doing them,
but his intentions may not be as pure...

Be. Careful.

[DanielleMaria05]

Well, first, YOU'RE RELATED! EVEN DISTANTLY!! EWWWWW, and Well, until you turn 18, this relationship is illegal. Yeah, so, I guess if you want to risk it on him, go for it, if not, dont...

[EmmalieV]

Wow.. he thinks your hot now just from two years? You seem kinda easy. You knew this guy from 3-4 years but you only lived and actually KNEW him for a couple of months until he moved out. You were 15, he was.. 24?!
I know age doesn't matter but this guy isn't being true to you.
It seems like he only loves you because of your looks or something. How can you love someone when you.. don't even.. take the time to know him?

It's weird. You guys have a cousinly relationship and then you guys start making out and doing explicit things. Haha.. he's your.. cousin. Haha!

I agree , guys that age only think about a few things and havng a full relationship with a young girl isnt really what theyre thinking about.

[Skyline Drive]

This guy is getting to the age where he should be looking into marriage and your not even legal. Your still related.. even if it is distant. That is just disturbing. I'm sure this guy only has one thing on his mind and we all know what that is.

Try finding someone your age and who isn't related to you.

[phoo]

If you marry cousin, you must be from weird family. No one marry cousin here. That is for people who chew straw. Do not do it1

[*AngelicEyz00*]

I'm 17 and now I'm thinking me hooking up with a 23 year old isn't so bad

[cewinee]

hey listen.. the times you've hooked up with this guy was when one or both of you had a couple of drinks, second time hella drunk (he technically took advantage of you, using drinks as an excuse to make a move on you) that happens all the time when ppl hook up but coming from a 26year old to a 17 year old, its different. its a big deal. i dont think this is gonna go anywhere serious u know? in my opinion that is. you could call it a fun experience or watever (no regrets right! =) but think about wat ur getting urself into n wat u think ull benefit from it. right now HE seems to benefit alot from you physically - nothing more, get wat im saying? ur risking urself into a hell more trouble than getting anything good out of this if you continue a relationship with him (legally, emotionally and wat not).

i'm not really the type to judge couples age wise but the impression i get from this 26 year old guy trying to get with a nice 17 year isnt good. i highly recommend you dont risk it =( i mean you're not in love with him are you? if you are im sure its cuz of the things he knows wat n how to say n the things he does to you that makes you feel as old as he is n happy n.. u get wat i mean? i get the impression this hasnt gone on for a while so it hasnt really gone into anything serious? he's 26, more experienced, he knows these things. but then again i dont him, so it comes down to you. do u know him well enough to trust him? just think about it.

you're 17 and i'm sure a wonderful, beautiful girl (woman ), you deserve better! =) u dont need this guy to put ur life on hold or watever he's thinking of doing with you.. he's gona cause u alot of trouble and of course alot of emotional pain at one point or another. anyway it all comes down to you ok? jus helpin out for u to realize some things before u get get hurt =( take care n good luck. lemme know how it goes? pls! worried.. i know we dunno bout each other at all but i get worried easily for ppl D; take care.

[redderstarr]

well, if you end up having sex before you turn 18, it would be considered illegal. cool





(jk about the cool)

[*jooleeah*]

Hm.
Well. If you have a relationship with him, all i have to say is be careful.

[Haruka]

Thanks everyone. Just by reading your replies, i've realized what i did isn't worth it. He's a smooth talker and i fell for it ahahah.. well

at least i got something to remember hehehe =]

I'mma tell him i want to stop. thanks!

[DrEaMgUy2K1]

lol .....age doesnt matter....but theres somewhere u gotta stop haha....17 and 26 .... rofl....

[lilJdawg]

Wow, that's a big age difference. i don't think it's a good idea. your still a minor & he's an adult. since everybody thinks of him as your cousin, it be wierd for the public to see you dating your cousion & rumors will flow. He could be really mature & not really understand you.

[expoised]

hm. its good that you realized what you were doing and decided to stop.

i knew this girl last year. she was 15 and her boyfriend was 26. the thing was that she knew that the only reason they were together was for the sex and she didn't give a damn. but then again... she was f**ked up half her life (psh... name the drug and she's probably done it). but i think its different for you b/c it doesnt seem like you're in this for the sex...

[HoodieObsessed]

Wait, so he's related to you and you are doing "non PG-13" things with him. Thats a little gross if you ask me. I would puke if I found out my ex was related to me because of some of the stuff we've done.
lol 500th post

Actually, not to contridict, but you are alowed to marry your own cousin..and have children and everything..and this guy soudns like he's WAY more distant than a cousin so I don't tihnk that relly matters.

[*Azarel*]

He wants to get into your pantiessss~

[WhiteLotus*]

I think your cousin might rape you.

I think he's taking advantage of you.

Fatality asically said all I wanted to say, so please.
Be careful, alright?

[yukichan]

kinda sounds strange to me...hes related to u...no matter how distant it is...thats kinda disturbing to me...i would say be careful..dont screw up ur life early...and if he was that awesome he should be hanging out with ppl his age...ur lucky u have a protective brother...