Without words Options

[*CrackedRearView*]

Heavenly Father,

How could you take him?!
How could a merciful, loving God inflict such anguish on one person?
How could you give him only thirteen years?
He deserved so many more…
He loved you with all of his being, God. He loved you.
I’m standing here, hands in the air, veins tattered, soul broken…
I’m standing here begging You to take me, and You won’t…
No, instead You’ll just erase the ones I love; the ones that matter to me…
You know I don’t matter to myself; You know I’d die for him.
Why him?
I’m moaning like an inconsolable child.
I’m trying to look past my enervation and interfere with Your ‘Divine Purpose’.
NO ‘DIVINE PURPOSE’ IS WORTH THAT LITTLE BOY’S LIFE; NONE.
I’m standing here stripped, God; stripped of everything I’m so ‘privileged’ to possess.
For the first time in my life I'm without words.
Take me, God. Take me.

In Your name I pray,

Amen.


Brandon,

You’ll always my invincible man.
You were everything I’d ever expect a little brother to be.
I love you with all of my heart and soul.
It should have been me, buddy.
B-man, Brandonius, King Bee, B-Scott, Brando-man, my brother,
You’re all of them. None of that will ever change.
I envy you, man. You’re in the place I’ll be longing to reside for years to come.
You are my life, my love. The same goes for Cameron.
You make me, Brandon.
You will always be my hero.

With love ineffable, your brother, your friend, your sidekick, coach, mentor, and “slave”,

Justin