Lawn Mower Accident, Poor Dog.. Options

[*Uronacid*]

My neighbor has... had this little runt Chihuahua, and it always pisses and craps in my yard. It makes me absolutely crazy. Sometimes it will actually look at me while it does it's business. I feel as if the damn thing is just out to get me.

So, one day I'm mowing my lawn with a push mower listening to my mp3 player when I see that damn dog sitting in the lawn taking a blasted shit. I was having a pretty good time listening to my music, and to make my good time better I decided to scare the hell out of this dog.

It's back was facing me, and it was squatting. I was literally going to scare the shit out of something. I turned my push mower up so I could run faster, and turned it towards the little bastard. He was about 15 yards away, but now I was closing in. 12, 11, 10... I was running faster and faster. Every step I took I could feel the vengeance made my veins surge with vengeance. 7, 6, 5... the dog wasn't moving. That mother f**ker was still shitting on my lawn.

I was going to have to slow down soon, but I couldn't just give up. This damn dog was mocking me by sitting there shitting on my lawn while I chased him down. I was not going to give up, and if I did give up I wasn't going to give up until the very last second. 3, 2, 1.. then it happened. I had forgotten about the fox hole that bastard's son dug in my lawn last. I tripped and fell, but so did the lawnmower.

I will never forget that sound. The sound of dog being mangled beneath the blades of my poor lawnmower. I screamed like a little girl as my lawnmower chomped away. I scrambled backward afraid of what had just occurred.

I was so f**king mad. "f**k you!", I yelled in a terrified scream while shaking from the massive adrenaline rush. The words rushed from my mouth like a little skinny kid trying to keep his pride with the last word after getting his ass kicked in a fight.

I grabbed the lawnmower by the handle and threw it across my lawn. There lay the carcass of that little dead bastard dog. "f**k you! f**k you!", I yelled with a pointing finger and kicked it into my neighbors yard.

Just as it landed behind his child's plastic play toy, my neighbor came out. "Shit..", I said muffled under my breath.

"What's all this ruckus!?", he exclaimed, "You're going to wake up my kid!"

"Sorry sir...", I said in a slave to master tone of voice.

"You better be sorry damn it!", He shouted back as he slammed his back door.

I ran over to the little play fort, grabbed the bloody mass that was once a dog trying carefully not to spill any of it's organs on my neighbors lawn. I ran into my house locked the door, threw it into my garbage can, and quickly took out the trash.

I feel so guilty about this. My neighbor has no idea. To this day their family still thinks that dog ran away. Whenever my friends see the paper with the dogs picture posted on it in the local quick mart they always laugh at me.

Has anything like this happened to you?