I will rule the world, or see it burnt to ashes around me... Options

[ComradeRed]

Greetings, Comrades!

I am Alexei Ivanovich Karasov, a sergeant-commissar in the Proletarian Red Army. You may call me Comrade Alexei. I bear warm greetings from the place that is not so warm, I mean my motherland of Russia.

In my Motherland, it is traditional for us to throw the severed claw of a Siberian Bear around to introduce ourselves. This tradition was abolished in the October Revolution because only decadant bourgeois pig-dogs could afford Siberian Bears. Today, we just throw around the severed hand of a bourgeois pig-dog instead.

So, then, Comrades, what adventures and transpirings bring you to the Red Army?