createBlog Diary., Version 3. Options

[inthemudhole]

Okie. The other one was getting really long. @_@
So here I am.. making a new one. :P

Credit to faithin_felix for the last diary thread.

Guidelines/Rules/Format

-Please do it in diary format. (Example: Dear createBlog Diary,)
-Talk about your day, or anything else like that.
-Don't post in here solely to comment on someone else's day.. you can quote them, but don't make that your post.

(That's all I can think of right now. Another mod can add onto this if you wish to.)

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I'll start it off, then.

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Hey.

Things have been.. shitty again..
Well, I was absolutely ECSTATIC yesterday.. and I still am.

Just things with my personal life have been getting me down a lot lately.
There have been a lot of feuds in my household lately, I got bad grades for the first semester, my parents are going to freak about my grades, my friend keeps ditching me for her boyfriend, my other friend is going to ask this guy out who I've been liking since the beginning of this school year.. and other assorted things.

I'm extremely stressed out right now, believe it or not.
I'm SUCH a procrastinator. I REALLY need to break that habit.
I'm going to do MUCH better for the second semester. That is my main goal right now.. to get really good grades to make up for the crappy semester one grades.

I'm still kind of.. discouraged.
>< Bleh.

I don't even know what I want to do with my life.
I know I'm only 13 and only in the 8th grade, but it just hit me today.. I need to start thinking about a career so I can take the appropriate classes to help me with getting that career.
We had the school counselors come into English and talk to us about setting goals and crap like that for our future.. that's why it hit me. I NEED to get a back-up career, too.. since who knows if my band will make it big by the time I form it?

Oh well. Maybe I should focus on the positive part of my day.

eEeee! Schedule change. Cody's now in two of my classes. <3

Now I have clay and sculpture instead of wood.. eEee! Josh is in that class. <3 Crap. >< He'll probably end up sitting by me, too.. since he was absent today.. and the only open spots in the classroom are at my table, and at the table next to me.

Anyway, I typed out a lot today..

See yah.

-Brie

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Alright! Resume posting!

[Chii]

Dear createBlog diary,

i used to be the good girl who went to school everyday and got good grades...now my grades have sunk into the ground and life is just hell...it's like since my parents started being up my ass about everything...it's just been a downward spiral...it's not because i'm stupid, i just can care the f*ck less about school, it's not a #1 priority to me anymore, i just want to be with my boyfriend and no one else...that's the only real time i'm happy any way...

i'm not happy being in this hell hole with my parents, i'm not happy with them, they don't make me happy, they don't even treat me like a f*ckin person...i can honestly careless if they just died, i won't shed a single tear

i rarely went to school last term because i just wanted to spite my parents, and because of that i failed all my classes with 55's (except for one 50), my teachers have said that i have the potential to do better, it surprised me that my math teacher said it because i thought he hated me...i don't mean to brag or seem full of myself but i know it's true, i know i'm smart, it's only that i don't care

my parents being a pain in my ass is escalating...it's making me want to move out more and more by the time i'm 18...

a sad pitiful thing i must confess...i've never been to a full day of school...that upsets me and makes me feel so horrible...i tried to get to school on time so many times but i just always fail...i get so discouraged

i hate it how people can't own up to what they say...i refused to go to art class because my teacher ridiculed me and i confronted her but she only got mad at me for telling her the truth and made class hell for me

you know what? it's so stupid that people online pretend they have this fabulous life when it's all a big lie, it's disgusting why do you people lie about your lives on a stupid website? just so you can get like net props or whatever? so you'll be popular online?

and why are people so fake? it's like you know what? that girl is ugly, she knows it, you know it everyone else knows it but won't admit it, what's the point in saying that she's beautiful or pretty? lies like that hurt people in the long run, you're only building up her confidence which will make her crash and burn because her "beauty" was all a lie and no one told her the truth

i know i have to try to do better in school because some how down the road it will help me...i just wish that for like 10 minutes my mom will just leave me alone and just let me be...i'll never be the daughter she wanted...i'll never be able to speak that perfect chinese...i'll never be a doctor or lawyer...i know it and she knows it too so why won't she just shut the f*ck up?

why do people act like they're all big on the internet? it makes no sense to me, oh look i can curse you out and diss you better that makes me so cool i mean really, we're all just people online, words aren't going to make us bow down to you...and to those idiot children who think they're all that and intelligent, there's a difference between speaking your mind and being a bratty little insulting geek who just looks up "big" words on an online dictionary

so yeah...this is what life is to me...by the way did i mention it's me and johnny's 6th month anniversary? hehe, that boy makes me so happy i swear...if he never stepped into my life...i have no idea who i'd be and i'd just be whoring myself out there if it wasn't for him...god, i just wish i was 18 so i can just run away with him...like you know...leave and run to wherever fate leads us...

ps
i don't want to use my real last name anymore...i just want to take johnny's now

pps
good god is this long

much love,
M.L. x3