createBlog Diary., Version 3. Options

[inthemudhole]

Okie. The other one was getting really long. @_@
So here I am.. making a new one. :P

Credit to faithin_felix for the last diary thread.

Guidelines/Rules/Format

-Please do it in diary format. (Example: Dear createBlog Diary,)
-Talk about your day, or anything else like that.
-Don't post in here solely to comment on someone else's day.. you can quote them, but don't make that your post.

(That's all I can think of right now. Another mod can add onto this if you wish to.)

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I'll start it off, then.

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Hey.

Things have been.. shitty again..
Well, I was absolutely ECSTATIC yesterday.. and I still am.

Just things with my personal life have been getting me down a lot lately.
There have been a lot of feuds in my household lately, I got bad grades for the first semester, my parents are going to freak about my grades, my friend keeps ditching me for her boyfriend, my other friend is going to ask this guy out who I've been liking since the beginning of this school year.. and other assorted things.

I'm extremely stressed out right now, believe it or not.
I'm SUCH a procrastinator. I REALLY need to break that habit.
I'm going to do MUCH better for the second semester. That is my main goal right now.. to get really good grades to make up for the crappy semester one grades.

I'm still kind of.. discouraged.
>< Bleh.

I don't even know what I want to do with my life.
I know I'm only 13 and only in the 8th grade, but it just hit me today.. I need to start thinking about a career so I can take the appropriate classes to help me with getting that career.
We had the school counselors come into English and talk to us about setting goals and crap like that for our future.. that's why it hit me. I NEED to get a back-up career, too.. since who knows if my band will make it big by the time I form it?

Oh well. Maybe I should focus on the positive part of my day.

eEeee! Schedule change. Cody's now in two of my classes. <3

Now I have clay and sculpture instead of wood.. eEee! Josh is in that class. <3 Crap. >< He'll probably end up sitting by me, too.. since he was absent today.. and the only open spots in the classroom are at my table, and at the table next to me.

Anyway, I typed out a lot today..

See yah.

-Brie

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Alright! Resume posting!

[ichiban]

Dear CB Diary,

There's too much going on in my life right now.

First off, I'm PISSED. It took me three damn hours to think up of a science project, and I go up to my science teacher with my idea and dyou know what she says?! "It's so uncreative that the highest grade you can get is a C." And that is really not what I need right now. Ugh. So I have to think up of a whole new idea.

History has been hell. No, not the WORK. It's who I sit next to. Yeah, sounds childish but no one understands. I sit next to my best friend in elementary school, a guy that I liked for two whole years, and then he suddenly just stops talking to me and turns into a fag and a player. And talking to him again is just IMPOSSIBLE. We havent spoken for one and a half years. And mrs bell just decides to toss us together. this isnt going to work.

I miss Chaun. I miss him a lot. And i probably wouldnt be missing him so much if it wasnt for my cowardice and stupidity. JUST ASK HIM FOR HIS SCREENNAME. How hard was that? But it was too hard for me. I tried to find the words, but they wouldnt come. Now the next time I would have a chance to see him is yeah, TWO YEARS LATER. Would I still even be living in California two years later? THen i'll NEVER see him again. Chaun was just becoming a really good friend. And now, it's just impossible. Ask him for his stupid screenname... I couldnt even do that ... why? i dont know. I was scared. Shy. Embarrassed. Inside of my head, I was screaming ... but a whisper wouldnt even come out ....

And to make matters worse, I think I like PJ. Of all the guys in the world, PJ ... its kind of on and off feelings. one second im in love with him, and the next, i have no idea what im feeling. Maybe because its ... PJ. I met him exactly one year and six days ago, at a violin master class. Man I thought he was crazy at violin. My first impression of him was a hard working smart guy .. teh kind of guy i'd like to MARRY rofl. yeah. I didnt even know he went to my school beacuse he was a grade higher than me. the next day, i see him at school, in ORCHESTRA. yeah its about time he signed up. and i found out he was from taiwan .. a fob lol .. but he spoke english kind of well .. and we just kind of talked, and he was really nothing to me. kind of nonexistent. and then we got into a huge fight .. for no apparent reason lol but we really were at each other .. cussing each other and stuff. and then that ended suddenly. we started talking more ... became kinda better friends. and i realized that .. ive always felt something weird towards pj. ive always had feelings for him .. i jus never realized it. but it wasnt like that i had a crush on him. it was just feelings, thats all. we would talk online a lot .. mostly about orchestra lol .. we really had nothing else to talk about ... and then scsboa began .. he was in string orchestra, i was in full orchestra ... during break and everything, we hung out along with everyone else that went to our school .. and yesterday, january 23 .. i felt something stronger towards him than ever. we were watching band play .. i was next to you .. and then that weird feeling overcame me. you arent cute or hot in any way. you kind of look funny as a matter of fact .. but .. it was just YOU, thats all. and i fell in love .. for the first time ever..

But how would you ever understand? we werent ever meant to be anything more than friends. it wasnt the way God planned us. i'm an immature twelve year old, and youre this violin masterminded fourteen year old who hasnt liked a girl since he came from taiwan. well, he thought around 10 girls were pretty but he hasnt had feelings for any girls personality ... if i ever told him i liked him, he'd think i was insane .. and i dont even want to know what'll happen next.

You know, guys should be more .. hmm .. OUTGOING. everytime i meet a new guy, theyll always be quiet and ignorant. but yesterday, i meet a guy ive never spoken to before, and he smiles and says hey. thats just cool. guys should be more like him lol.

i have even more things on my mind. ill continue ...

so hey eric. we still friends? lol i guess not. oh well its okay, im over it. ive accepted that we can never be friends again. but guess what? i dont even know why. and i just have to blame it on you, im sorry. but ill explain. IVE BEEN TRYING TO TALK TO YOU EVER SINCE THE SCHOOL YEAR STARTED. Youve just been ignoring me for some reason. I've been trying so hard to make us the close friends we were just half a year ago ... and ive given up. im not gonna try anymore. im not gonna try and convince you anything. and just to tell you, i dont care if you never forgive me for going out with him. because if you dont know im sorry, then maybe youre just not meant to know me. i dont hate you, i just wish i never met you. i looked forward so much to talking to you and becoming even closer friends this year, and i guess thats not going to happen. whatever. but i do miss you. ha.

My life = Pathetic

- Just me ..