So discouraged... Options

[ichiban]

Okay. At school I'm in orchestra. And on Sunday there's an audition for this Southern California Honor Orchestra thing. And hell, I've been practicing more than I ever had. Last year I got a higher chair than the concertmaster at our school. So I just want to keep getting higher chairs.
And there's this "violin prodigy" guy at my school. And I mean it, he is INSANE at the violin. everything he plays sounds incredible. And right now i'm practicing this stupid Concerto ..for half a year .. like .. an hour and a half a day .. and i've been practicing even more since the audition is just in TWO DAYS .. and gosh. Today at school that violin prodigy guy heard me playing my song. And that moron started playing along, and he played around 23804234x better. And he doesn't even practice it; he just reads the music and plays. Everyone around us was going like "Michelle you got OWNED". You have no idea how discouraging that is .. i've been learning for five years; that guy, only a few years more and yet he plays better than me at a song i practice for hours, when he only puts in around what, 5 minutes each day to it?

This post is kind of pointless. I just don't feel too good.