A Drug's Rapacity Options

[*Kathleen*]

I hate drugs.


"A Drug's Rapacity"
I dream of concocting a subterfuge to move on
Yet, his inscrutable behavior attracts me
Regardless of his nonchalant actions, he's gone

The infamous (yet equally nefarious) friend is to blame
It's love...despite his incorrigible behavior
Granted, deep down, all men are all but one in the same

My body collapses as I take the plunge below
Deeper I sink as the ubiquitousness of water surrounds
I made sure to leave the letter - a guarantee for him to know

No more sanguine-natured friends to speak
No more paranoid nights spent battling tears
No more contemplating the future as being so bleak

My chagrin brought upon his temerity
My volatility annihilated by his melancholy
This lugubrious immolation defies my tenacity

If only this were not so useless
If only his eyes were not sewn shut
He might have seen how they are utterly deleterious

[NatiMarie]

Excellent use of words Kathleen.

I like the flow of it.

I dream of concocting a subterfuge to move on
Yet, his inscrutable behavior attracts me
Regardless of his nonchalant actions, he's gone

The first two lines...kind of don't flow together. First you're saying that you want to make a blind person move on, yet their behavior attracts me. The 'yet' kind of...messes up the rhythm of the message. The third line...regardless of his casual ways...he's gone. I like the meaning, but it's kind of hard to be in that type of situation. They don't like together. Being casual and gone...eep!

The infamous (yet equally nefarious) friend is to blame
It's love...despite his incorrigible behavior
Granted, deep down, all men are all but one in the same

^That's my favorite stanza.

;]


I like the ending as well.
It's very different and the concept is great. I like the way you structured it...
:]
Good job Kathleen!