Log In · Register

 

Humor Forum Rules

Please respect our community and follow the rules. There are many types of humor so we can do without those that aim to hurt/offend individuals and groups of people alike.

The community guidelines are addressed to ALL forums, which means the humor forum is undoubtedly included. However, we stress that these rules are especially observed in this forum:


NO OBSCENITY
This includes, but is not limited to excessive swearing, flaming, posting of pornographic images Racism, Homophobic, sexist remarks or bigotry of any sort.
PICTURES: No nudity of any type is allowed on the boards.

NO DUPLICATE TOPICS
If a topic exists a couple of pages away covering the same issues then the new one will be deleted or merged. Look through the pages to see if it has already been posted, if not then it should be okay to post.


Please do not violate the guidelines. It is here for a reason and is not to be ignored.

Thank you.

The young actor, ...
diezelbabygrl_xo...
post Sep 9 2004, 04:16 PM
Post #1


Yum. =]
*****

Group: Member
Posts: 888
Joined: May 2004
Member No: 16,139



A strikingly handsome young man walked into the office of a Hollywood agent with his resume and portfolio in hand. The agent reviewed the young man's slim resume and small portfolio with the care that was deserving of his fine young specimen.
"You have the very obvious good looks and excellent demeanor of an actor. Tell me, have you had any roles that I might be aware of."

"Other than the requisite high school and college plays, no sir," said the handsome young man.

"I dare say I know the reason why, with a name like yours," said the agent.

"Sir?"

"Your name. Penis Van Lesbian. That's not a name that will go far in Hollywood. I'd love to represent you, but you'll have to change your name."

"Sir," the handsome young man protested. "The Van Lesbian name was my father's, my grandfather's and his father's name. We have carried this name for generations and I will not change it for Hollywood or any other reason."

"If you won't change your name, I cannot represent you young man."

"Then I bid you farewell -- my name will not change." With that, Penis Van Lesbian left the agents office never to return.

Five Years Later: The Hollywood agent returned to his office after lunch with some producers and shuffled through his mail. Mostly junk mail, trade journals and the like. There was one letter. He opened the envelope and removed the letter. As he unfolded the fine linen paper, a check dropped from the folds and onto his desk. He looked at the check. It was for 50,000 dollars! He read the letter:

Dear Sir: Several years ago, I entered your office determined to become an actor. You refused to represent me unless I changed my name. I objected, saying the Penis Van Lesbian name had been carried for generations and left your office. However, upon leaving, I chanced to reconsider my hastiness and after considerable reflection, I decided to heed your advice and endeavored to change my name. Now I am a famous actor with many roles and known to millions worldwide.

Having achieved this fame and fortune, it is often that I think back to my meeting with you and your insistence that I change my name. I owe you a debt of gratitude, so please accept this check with my humble thanks, for it was your idea which has brought me to such wealth and fame.

Very Sincerely Yours,

D!ck Van Dyke
 
 
Start new topic
Replies
TheSilenceInDict...
post Sep 11 2004, 04:10 AM
Post #2


Will write poetry for sex!
******

Group: Member
Posts: 1,110
Joined: Jan 2004
Member No: 600



Awesome...Well done joke. biggrin.gif
 

Posts in this topic
diezelbabygrl_xoxo   The young actor   Sep 9 2004, 04:16 PM
inlonelinessidie   LOL. I've never heard that one before.   Sep 9 2004, 06:00 PM
Days Nearly Over   Nice. Ha.   Sep 9 2004, 06:59 PM
strwbrrykiwi23   LMFAO   Sep 9 2004, 07:12 PM
stephinika   lol! i like it.   Sep 9 2004, 07:18 PM
rhqtpie   haha nice   Sep 9 2004, 08:02 PM
o0_BLuez_0o   lol thats funny and thats an actual actors name lo...   Sep 9 2004, 09:29 PM
pnai4eva   wow, that's actualy funny!   Sep 10 2004, 03:55 PM
racegirl24A   lmfao!!!! never heard that one be...   Sep 10 2004, 09:10 PM
AznKutie   LMAO!!! its great...luv it!   Sep 10 2004, 10:16 PM
MasteRxKiD   Awesome...Well done joke.   Sep 11 2004, 04:10 AM
corizzle20   haah. thats funny   Sep 19 2004, 12:46 AM


Reply to this topicStart new topic
1 User(s) are reading this topic (1 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members: