my poetry, a lil collection Options

[black_cloud10]

Notice! Notice! Listen to me!
Its important that you know
I'm not what I pretend to be.

I'm not crazy, I'm not insane!
My skull isn't hollow
I've actually got a brain

I'm not heartless or cold
I'm not at all apathetic
I'm sure as shit not bold

I hear you talk about me when I'm not there
I cry when I'm alone
Don't believe that I don't care

I'm never sure if I'm in love
I'm really insecure
In my faith in the above

I wonder what you'll think now
If you'll ignore these words
Or accept who I really am somehow

_________________________________

Screaming inside
Because this isn't me
Burning alive
And smiles are all you see
Supressing insecurities
With every tear I'm not crying
Acting as though I don't care
When inside I'm slowly dying
Lying with a straight face
Without even trying
Avoiding showing fear
And refusing to be confiding
Locking myself in my own cell
Because of everything I'm hiding

__________________________________

This isn't real
You can't be gone
Your body lays still
Puddle of blood on the lawn
My vision begins to blue
I hear my frantic screams
Death closely lures
Tell me its a dream
Too young, its unfair
Revenge and anger flood my mind
Then overwhelming despair
I run to leave it all behind
I don't belong, don't exist
A demon in the shadows
A spirit in the mist
Drowning in the shallows
Escaping in my lies
Your love for me was true
Too late to apologize
I had to be rid of you.

_______________________________

Don't want to be here
Don't want to be alone
Don't want to be so crowed
Don't want to be so alone

Don't understand your words
Don't understand your actions
Don't understand your reasoning
Don't understand your reaction

Don't think about yesterday
Don't think about tomorrow
Don't think about happiness
Don't think about sorrow

Don't know if this is real
Don't know if this is fake
Don't know if this is destiny
Don't know if this is a mistake

_______

comments welcome