(Ex-) Boyfriend is gay. Options

[pinacoolada]

Hey guys. I guess I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this. My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years told me he was gay two days ago. It was a very messy break up, and I'm extremely hurt. He came out to me as bisexual about 2 weeks ago and he said my support and acceptance has helped him accept himself and his sexuality. While I'm happy for him and glad that he got it out to someone, I feel horrible for myself. This person was my best friend and things were great with us. He told me he has always known that he was attracted to guys, and that he suppressed it. He also said he genuinely loved me and was genuinely attracted to me, but the attraction diminished slowly beginning about 4 months ago, when he started admitting his sexuality to himself.

I am utterly lost, and I know I need to get over him, but this just hurts so much. I feel like someone has punched a hole through me. Has anyone else gone through a similar situation? How did you cope? When does it stop feeling so empty?

[creole]

Hey guys. I guess I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this. My boyfriend of 3 1/2 years told me he was gay two days ago. It was a very messy break up, and I'm extremely hurt. He came out to me as bisexual about 2 weeks ago and he said my support and acceptance has helped him accept himself and his sexuality. While I'm happy for him and glad that he got it out to someone, I feel horrible for myself. This person was my best friend and things were great with us. He told me he has always known that he was attracted to guys, and that he suppressed it. He also said he genuinely loved me and was genuinely attracted to me, but the attraction diminished slowly beginning about 4 months ago, when he started admitting his sexuality to himself.

I am utterly lost, and I know I need to get over him, but this just hurts so much. I feel like someone has punched a hole through me. Has anyone else gone through a similar situation? How did you cope? When does it stop feeling so empty?

um, was he ever aroused by you? i'm sorry, but if i were you i'd never go out with my best friend. I had a gf who was bi but then turned lesbian, but i was cool with it. maybe it was because the term of the relationship wasn't that long, but i knew if it made them more happier, then i guess it's just best to let them go. i know 3 years is pretty long, but have you ever though about those 3 years could have actually realized who he is as a person? i know it was a waste of time for you, but at least you helped him. are you still thinking about being friends with him again?

[pinacoolada]

um, was he ever aroused by you? i'm sorry, but if i were you i'd never go out with my best friend. I had a gf who was bi but then turned lesbian, but i was cool with it. maybe it was because the term of the relationship wasn't that long, but i knew if it made them more happier, then i guess it's just best to let them go. i know 3 years is pretty long, but have you ever though about those 3 years could have actually realized who he is as a person? i know it was a waste of time for you, but at least you helped him. are you still thinking about being friends with him again?

Yes, he was aroused by me. I feel like he suppressed his orientation so much and buried it deep inside himself that he tricked himself into being "straight". He wrote off being un-aroused by straight porn and being neutral about straight sex as just being "unhorny". We did have sex and it wasn't very often, but I think that's what made it so good. The sex was fine too. He told me he started noticing that something was up with him when we started having sex more frequently.