The Awakening, Poem |
 Apr 21 2009, 07:47 AM
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#1
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 Candy & Cookie Tester  Group: Member Posts: 76 Joined: Apr 2009 Member No: 724,880  |
Open your eyes!
Why can't you open them? The worlds end is so close I'm sure you want to see it! I'm by your side so don't be scared Keeping your eyes closed won't protect you It's so close can't you tell. The signs are everywhere It's time to wake up Open your eyes the days of the reborn world are before you. Ok so I wrote this poem a while back and i've even submitted it on a website, here it is My Poem's |
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Apr 23 2009, 10:24 PM
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#2
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 Senior Member Group: Administrator Posts: 2,648 Joined: Apr 2008 Member No: 639,265 |
You the potential for a lot of rich imagery, but you don't really use it. You even have a line, "The signs are everywhere," but you haven't actually shown any of the signs.
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Posts in this topic
Superase The Awakening Apr 21 2009, 07:47 AM
synatribe Im guessing it is a blank verse because you do not... Apr 21 2009, 08:58 AM
iGio QUOTE(synatribe @ Apr 21 2009, 09:58 AM) ... Apr 28 2009, 10:20 PM Superase Thanks for the advice everyone! Ok so i've... Apr 27 2009, 08:33 AM |
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