Shit |
Shit |
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#1
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![]() ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,309 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 65,593 ![]() |
This is a short poem I wrote when I was feeling a bit emo after I had broke up with my ex 1.5 years ago. So yeah. Hope you guys like it.
I felt the need to share it, because I see the writing forum livelier, and would like to contribute as well. I titled it "Shit", because that's how I felt when I wrote it. Wasted... to the core I’m faded… colorful illusions paint my world as I enjoy the view through tinted windows. The voice of reason speaks again From the corner of the room, Where the black hole lies I dare not go near For fear I be sucked down. Turn the music louder And drown her out. I move my queen Checkmate. The game is over, But who has won? I’m left to wonder… Time melts on the branch And I sneer I will not be your fool! the only response my lazy echo repeats “..your fool.” Or was it you’re a fool? I could’ve sworn… No. There’s noone here. I’m alone. Wasting away. Fading into the backdrop Of the walls I create. |
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#2
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![]() Tick tock, Bill ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Administrator Posts: 8,764 Joined: Dec 2005 Member No: 333,948 ![]() |
Tung, even though this is pretty emo (actually, not terribly emo, I've read some awful emo poetry), this is really quite good. You have a good sense of imagery.
Turn the music louder And drown her out. and tone. |
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#3
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![]() ٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,309 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 65,593 ![]() |
Tung, even though this is pretty emo (actually, not terribly emo, I've read some awful emo poetry), this is really quite good. You have a good sense of imagery. Turn the music louder And drown her out. and tone. Haha. I'll admit, I was listening to some loud screamo Senses Fail music while doing this, so that's where the idea of the line came from. Reference to Salvador Dali's melting clock paintings? If so, awesome. I love his work. Nice allusion. Actually I don't know who that is lol. But thanks. shorten, and submit to contest prs. ![]() Lol, but then I'll have to cut out 10. Maybe i'll write another one to submit |
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#4
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Head Staff Posts: 18,173 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 108,478 ![]() |
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