What is manly? Options

[MrElsewhere]

*puts serious pants on*

There of course is the typical bearded, wood-cutter, muscular man (Chuck Norris joke goes here). But beyond that, how is a man manly?

I think a man should be strong mentally and emotionally. However, I am not saying that he is ideally a cold and calculating person. He is instead compassionate, honest, and respectful. At some point bravery comes into play in a man's life.

Compassionate men aren't as rare a breed as you might think. Although more of them would be a plus. But if a man is compassionate, it is fine for him to cry. But at times...bravery doesn't allow this or restricts it. Showing emotions that are stereotypically weak (fear, sorrow) does not make you any less of a man--it actually makes you more manly.

Integrity makes a man reliable (and even respectable!). Dependability allows men to be the rock of a family unit (as a father or guardian). On that note, being a good father is very manly. Betrayal and talking behind backs is unbecoming of a man because it fosters a lot of hate and disunity among men. Although integrity can force a man to do what he knows to be right, even if it betray others.

Women say chivalry is dead and they are for the most part correct. Many guys don't do the little niceties that women like. During the beginning stages of a relationship, the guy would open the door, pull out the chair, or offer the jacket, but as time goes by, many just kind of stop. The relationship is comfortable and these subtle details seem unnecessary. Chivalry shows respect for the relationship, it shows men still care.

TL;DR version: Men iz compassionate, honest, and respectful. Sometime men iz brave, too.

What else constitutes a man?

*takes serious pants off*

[gojira]

"Figure out your values. If you don’t know who you are, what you value, and what your goals are, than you’ll find yourself easily buffeted about by any wind of change."


"What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. This rule, equally arduous in actual and in intellectual life, may serve for the whole distinction between greatness and meanness. It is the harder, because you will always find those who think they know what is your duty better than you know it. It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude."


"For the sake of brevity, I’ve culled what I believe to be the “Top 10″ of Lee’s admonitions appropriate for men in 2008. These are among the best pieces of manly advice I have given my own two sons:

1. On debt and frugal living: “It is easier to make our wishes conform to our means, than to make our means to conform to our wishes.” ~ Lee writing to one of his sons, 22 August 1860.
2. On marriage: “Never marry unless you can do so into a family that will enable your children to feel proud of both sides of the house.” ~ General Lee writing to J.B. Hood. Don’t wife hunt in bars or tattoo parlors.
3. On minding your own business: “Meddle or interfere with nothing with which you have no concern.” ~ Lee to his sons, 30 November 1845.
4. On humility: “It’s all my fault.” ~ Lee at Gettysburg. Be willing to admit your mistakes and take blame.
5. On honesty: “Private and public life are subject to the same rules; and truth and manliness are two qualities that will carry you through this world much better than policy, or tact, or expediency, or any other word that was ever devised to conceal or mystify a deviation from a straight line.” ~ One of Lee’s personal maxims. A young man should say what he means and mean what he says. Avoid the demeaning examples of politicians, government bureaucrats, and lawyers.
6. On manliness: “A man may manifest and communicate his joy, but he should conceal and smother his grief as much as possible.” ~ Lee to Mrs. Ann Fitzhugh.
7. On work: “There is scarcely anything that is right that we cannot hope to accomplish by labor and perseverance. But the first must be earnest and the second unremitting.” ~ Lee to Martha Williams.
8. On reading material: “Read history, works of truth, not novels and romances.” ~ Lee’s oft’ repeated advice to his children.
9. On education: “The education of a man or woman is never completed until they die.” ~ Lee writing to son Custis, 5 December 1860.
10. On what’s important: “Be true kind, and generous, and pray earnestly to God to enable you to keep His commandments and walk in the same all the days of your life.” ~ Lee to his sons, 31 March 1846."


lawl