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Sex Euphemisms, in books
Melissa
post Mar 14 2008, 01:55 AM
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What's the best euphemism for sex you've ever read in a book (any book! class book, romance novels, etc)?

We're reading Boccoccio's The Decameron in our Lit Hum class - it's basically a collection of short stories that ten people tell within a ten day period and most of them revolve around sex, it's pretty awesome.

There's this one story where a priest (of some sort) is trying to get this girl into bed without outwardly saying "hey, lets have sex" and it pretty much goes down like this:

Priest: you know, if you really want to service god, you should put the devil to hell.

Girl: how do I do that, father?

Priest: Well, follow my example. *takes off clothes*

Girl: *takes of clothes and points at Priest* What is that which sticks out in front of your body in which I do not possess!!

Priest: That's the Devil! But you know what? *points at girl* You have a Hell!

Girl: OMG

Priest: We must put the devil in hell!

And thus proceeds to sex her and successfully put the devil in hell many times.

Yeah, good stuff.
 
 
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superstitious
post May 13 2008, 08:16 PM
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Tick tock, Bill
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The works of Shakespeare are of full of them.

Some quotes from Midsummer's Night Dream -

"Swift as a shadow, short as any dream;
Brief as the lightning in the collied night."

"So quick bright things come to confusion."

"Masters, spread yourselves."

"I will roar you as gently as any sucking dove; I will roar you, as 'twere any nightingale."
 

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