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[AskAlice]

I'm Alice and I am here to answer your questions. Many of you are in your formative years and are in need of some guidance, may it be in relationships, school, work, family, whatever! So, I'm sure you guys want to get started. To send in a question, please e-mail askalicecb@gmail.com. You can use an anonymous e-mail from one of those websites if you feel that your problem is of a high magnitude. I will answer as many as I can, but if there is a high volume, I may not get to them all. I apologize in advance for this.

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[AskAlice]

Yay! First message!

Hey ALice.

I broke up with my ex-bf last august. And so we went a while without talking and everything. and then he messages me and says he needs me. So i give him another chance and i start talking to him and everything. and he promises he'll be my friend and be there for me. And then today he just calls me and says f**k you leave me alone and don't talk me. I don't know what to do. i want to get over him so bad. I was over him, but he said that and it just hurt so bad. And right now i just found out his girlfriend (whose cheated on him) is over at his house. I don't know if he's saying it b/c she's over there or what. i don't know what to think. He said he needed me and would be there for me. I don't know if i should just forget him. Or try to give him another chance if he tries.

First of all, it's obvious that this guy does not care about you. He just wants someone and he can see that you're not over him and vulnerable enough to give in whenever he says he wants you back. This kind of relationship is not healthy. Many, many girls stay in relationships simply because it's familiar and they want to be with someone and feel secure. Trust me, you would feel so much better and much more secure if you weren't always wondering whether or not he's on the same page as you. It doesn't sound like he is mature enough to be in a steady relationship and it doesn't sound like you are strong enough to be picky and make sure that the guy you have is the right guy for you, and only you. If I were in the situation, from what you've told me, I would definitely just halt all communication with the guy. That's the only way to get over anyone. You can't keep giving in. However, only you know the whole story, and you can make that decision yourself. Remember, though, that you must keep your ground and not give in. You will definitely not get over him if you keep talking to him and indulging him.