Kids Say the Darnedest Things, well, at least I do, I suppose Options

[superstitious]

I'll get straight to it. I am obnoxiously awkward socially. I just don't know what to say or how to react sometimes so I gave up even trying years ago.

Case in point:

Guy: Sometimes you don't know what's standing right in front of you.
Me: Oh man. Do they think that it's an ophthalmic problem? Or do you need glasses or something?

Hmm. Well of course he meant me, I'm just a moron.

Often I speak first, think later. I've been fortunate enough to encounter some individuals who find this trait endearing. I, however, find it annoying.

Anyone else completely blunderous this way? I wonder what makes people do that. I don't think there's a deep neurological reason or anything and it certainly isn't anything serious. I just wonder how and why some people are able to just let their words flow with such ease and grace while others (such as myself) stumble on nearly every syllable.

[HakunaMatata]

You know what I totally can't do? Look some people straight in the eye. I all of a sudden get all sensitive to light and I have to look down and my eyes get all prickly. It has nothing to do with how good-looking [or not good-looking] they are, I just....have trouble with that.

OH, and another example of awkwardness: all too often, I'm not wearing my glasses, and someone is talking to the person behind me, but thank you blurry eyes, I think they're staring straight at me. -.-