grieving Options

[deplorable]

i apologize, i am not normally one to ask advice from anonymous internet users, buy tomorrow it will be 4 yrs since my mother passed from breast cancer.i thought i could handle it, but this year feels especially hard. i feel like im spiraling in and out of reality and dreamland.

can anyone please give me some advice on how to handle this better... i can't let my family down right now.

thank you.

[MissFits]

I can't say I knwo exactly how you feel because everyone grieves differently, but I know what it's like to lose a parent and regret the way you treated them while they were alive.
It's one of the worst feelings in the world.
I also know what it feels like to have to stay strong for your family, when my dad died I had to raise my sisters on my own for a while while my mom battled a crack addiction.

It's hard and some times are harder than others, but it won't kill you. It really helps me to lock myself in a room alone and write him a letter telling him everything I am thinking while I cry my eyes out.
Someday I will take the letters to his gravesite and bury them, I know I am not ready to do that just yet.
You could also go to a trusted adult at school (like a counselor), or your close friends and talk to them. They may or may not understand but I am sure they would be more than willing to listen.

I'm here if you need to talk