Am I wasting my time?, 5 year relationship, give up now? Options

[msladyliberty]

Hello all!! This might be a little confusing, so I'm gonna try to keep it short and simple for you all.

It seems like every other year, my boyfriend gets into "flirty" conversations online with other girls. Somehow, I find out by accident (accidentally IM the "hey baby"). This has happened twice. He'd also talk to these girls hours on end on the phone while he was away (he's in the airforce).

I've let those 2 incidents go, because I felt that I didn't do enough on my part to love him, so I blamed myself. So 2 years past, and I just found out in June that he sent 2 dozen red roses to a Jonalyn in Hawaii (an ex-gf from like 8th grade, we're 23 and 24 now!). I was really upset this time because I actually thought he'd changed. On top of that, he "promised" me "twice," that he'd never do this again.

So, after the arguing, the fighting, the separation, then the breakup, we're back together. His reasons for doing this was because I wasn't "what he wanted me to be," yet he still begs for me to stay with him and work things out. I've been fooled and confused, yet I'm so in love with him. He promised he'd never do this again, and that he'll "really, really" change.

I really love this man, truly love him. I have changed dramatically since this has happened, and I've become this jealous, uptight, insecure person I swore I'd never be. He is truly an amazing person, yet I question my faith in us and I hate having doubts about it.

Question is:
Am I wasting my time with this man? I have given everything to him and sacrificed so much of my life and time for him. At 24, is he really being serious about us?

(I have never cheated on this man, never ever! I'm pretty damn loyal, besides I don't have time to cheat, I have to go to work and school!)

Your opinions are greatly appreciated, thank you for your time!

[Keriana]

Hello all!! This might be a little confusing, so I'm gonna try to keep it short and simple for you all.

It seems like every other year, my boyfriend gets into "flirty" conversations online with other girls. Somehow, I find out by accident (accidentally IM the "hey baby"). This has happened twice. He'd also talk to these girls hours on end on the phone while he was away (he's in the airforce).

I've let those 2 incidents go, because I felt that I didn't do enough on my part to love him, so I blamed myself. So 2 years past, and I just found out in June that he sent 2 dozen red roses to a Jonalyn in Hawaii (an ex-gf from like 8th grade, we're 23 and 24 now!). I was really upset this time because I actually thought he'd changed. On top of that, he "promised" me "twice," that he'd never do this again.

So, after the arguing, the fighting, the separation, then the breakup, we're back together. His reasons for doing this was because I wasn't "what he wanted me to be," yet he still begs for me to stay with him and work things out. I've been fooled and confused, yet I'm so in love with him. He promised he'd never do this again, and that he'll "really, really" change.

I really love this man, truly love him. I have changed dramatically since this has happened, and I've become this jealous, uptight, insecure person I swore I'd never be. He is truly an amazing person, yet I question my faith in us and I hate having doubts about it.

Question is:
Am I wasting my time with this man? I have given everything to him and sacrificed so much of my life and time for him. At 24, is he really being serious about us?

(I have never cheated on this man, never ever! I'm pretty damn loyal, besides I don't have time to cheat, I have to go to work and school!)

Your opinions are greatly appreciated, thank you for your time!

Lol Not laughing at your situation but at the fact that I have had pretty much the EXACT thing happen! Only my husband is in the Marines. It happened when he was over in Iraq. I would hear from friends that he called them, or someone would say "oh nick called today!" and I would be thinking hmmm...he didn't call me! I completely understand where you are coming from. I had a lot of trust issues because of one idiotic thing he did. Plus, it's a million times harder when you're so far away.

We ended up breaking up for about 3 months. And he cracked, he called me crying saying how much he regrets the past and wanted to make us work...yadayada. And now..we have been together for 5 1/2 years and we will be married for two years on August 26th.

It's very difficult having a long distance relationship. But if you work hard at it and your love is real. It'll all work out! Hope this helps! Feel free to PM me if you have any questions or just need to talk!