Bloody Mary, Say WHAT???? Options

[bat19]

Bloody Mary, a name turned horror icon from films such as Candyman and One Horse for Two Horny Southerners, starring Benicio Del Toro and Rod Stewart. But what does it mean? Does her roots date back to the mother of christ? She must have been bloody after that pregnancy, if indeed she was a virgin. My guess is she was a whore who didnt want her husband to find out her pussy was wider than a bike tire. so she made sure none of her f**k buddies pulled out and pretended to be struck dumb by god.

My guess is that the term Bloody Mary comes from Mary Cartillo, a hemopheliac Puerto Rican daughter of a poor blacksmith. Her name transcended to legend, after the son of a nobleman tried to take her as his own. She took a screwdriver and stabbed his testicles, stomping the one that fell near her boots. The noblemans son, after seeing what irreparable damage had been done, took the closest blade and cut off her tits. Amazingly the senorita had survived, but the bleeding was never subdued. She spent the rest of her days bleeding from the tits on any passerby. The nobleman's son spent his days in solitude, balless and humiliated. And so is the legend of Bloody Mary Cartillo.

[bat19]

You have no idea. And no, she did not grant eternal life. Quite the opposite actually. Because her tits bled forever they eventually grew infected. Now most of the infection was held back due to breakthroughs in modern medicine, but the blood was unclean. Many say the first case of AIDS came from a local houligan who lost a bet and had to drink a glass of tit blood. Liver spots broke out on his skin instantly as he fell back in pain. A nearby villager ran to his aid, but when realizing it was the very same boy that had stuck his finger in the anus of his goat the day before took this opportunity to stick his finger up the boys own anus as punishment. This villager took with his stinkfinger a diluted version of this killer virus which we now call AIDS.