When will this stop! Options

[JonathanK]

Well if you guys/girls never read any of my previous posts here has what happened to me in the last 2 weeks

*K so if you guys/girls saw my last couple of posts awhile ago so many bad things have happened to me in the past week and a half. My girlfriend Broke up with me, she said she would still be my friend and talk to me. then a couple of days later my grandfather passed away. And then when i needed to talk to her the most she stopped talking to me and now ignored me somewhat. We talk sometimes but it's only for a short while now. I really wanna know whats going on in her head. I was thinking of like going in the same room as her and blocknig the door and say like * I wanna talk to you not this wall i have been talking to for the past 2 weeks*. Like i still have some feelings for her since she was my first girlfriend and i heard she still likes me too. Lately I've just been so pissed off. Like i feel like i'm losing control. When My cousin and I went boxing this guy was bugging us and if you have seen the movie fight club I basically pulled that. He punched me in the gut and I just basically kept asking for more like *No i didn't quite catch that man* then he hit me. Then I replied *still not getting it* he hit me again. lol then I was like * i got it, i got it, i got it.....shit I lost it* then when he tried to hit me again I tackled him and broke his nose. it's like i blacked out or something. I just get really frustrated with what has happened so far.*

And now a couple of days ago i find out my friend i have known for 2 years was stabbed to death. There was a fight that broke out and a girl was about to hit another one with a bat so he took it away cause he hates violence. them so guy comes up behinds him and stabs him in the chest. Then today i finally talked to my ex. I told her how wrong it is to give someone a promise and not make it happen. Then later on she said she doesn't want to be my friend anymore. So now i lost her friendship and my grad date. I'm am so depressed right now. How can one man who sacrifices for other people cause i help people everday in my life loose so much in about 3 weeks. It seems there is no end to the sorrow and pain in my life. i'm sick and tired of all of this. I honestly feel hopeless right now.

Oh and P.S.
And of course, she still wants to be 'friends'. For those of you who don't know, that means she wants you to provide her emotional support, while she ignores you for her girlfriends... And my pathetic ass puts up with it.