Just A Strange Feeling., This is really long, but I'd appreciate any help. Options

[azn_shortie]

Sorry, I think I let it get too personal.
The more I think about it, the more vulnerable I find myself. Sorry for taking up time, but I guess I'm too much of a coward to keep this here, because it makes me feel weak and defenseless. I'll be okay; there's a war out there, so I don't have much of a reason to worry about silly things.

Thank you to everyone who read or replied though. It was truly appreciated.

[megggnasty]

^ I think she said she's 14 and he's 16 and a half.

I'm going through really similar types of feelings that I think you're also feeling, though they are problems with friends and family rather than a boy. It's REALLY important that you do what makes you happy, as hard as that is with a family like yours. Though they think they're helping you out, they're only making matters worse and you need to point that out to them before you fall any deeper into this pit of depression.

Just a few days ago I tried going to therapy and didn't like it at all, but it could work for you. It really just depends on the type of person you are. I hate sharing my personal information with people I don't know really well; if you're like that then it may not be a good choice, but it's always worth a try (this is definitely a good first step to talking; sometimes not being face-to-face is easier).

For the family issues, I strongly advise you to sit down with your parents and really talk to them one-on-one. Explain to them how you truly feel and how what they say lowers your self-esteem and makes you feel sad. Describe what you feel, when you feel it and why so they can better understand where you're coming from. Make sure to tell them that you love them and appriciate all they have done to help you pave your life, but also tell them that your future is YOURS to decide in the end.

As for the boy issue, I don't really know what to say. Feelings like yours don't change overnight. You can't one day not be sure about love and wake up the next morning fall in love. Love takes time to grow. You need to remember that it is possible to love more than one person. From what you've said, he seems like a genuine guy. If he's taking enough time to let you explain how you can trust him, then he seems pretty serious about it. I know it's hard, but try and talk to him and tell him that it will take time. The more you spend time together, the more you'll get to know eachother and the more you will be able to trust him.

I hope that helped. PM me if you want to talk; I'm always willing to listen.