vulnerable Options

[Winter]

I've started posting since like March but I am sure none of you actually really know me. And it's great you know, coz cB has been like an escape for me. cB is where I am able to truly be myself, no mask or anything.

When I got here, I decided to not get involved too much. Like be friends with all these people. I am not doing that again after what happened in kpopper. And I've done that. None of you have ever communicated with me outside of the forums.

But then I started talking with Chris (asiangetokewl) on AIM and it's so easy to talk with him. For once there is someone who understands how I feel. Someone actually knows part of the pain I go through.

And now I feel incredibly vulnerable. Someone understands me. I just feel scared. I don't know why.

Why am I feeling this? Why do I feel so scared?

[Winter]

W0W ASHLEY...WE SH0ULD TALK T0 EACH 0THER 0N AIM... I THINK WE ARE FL00DING THIS T0PIC JUS U AND ME L0LS!! S0 YEAH...WAT`Z UR AIM SN? L0LS WAIT I D0NT G0T AIM IN THIS C0MPUTER...HEH.. HMM.. MAYBE LATER? BUT NEWAIS AWW UR EVEN CRIED? AWW THIS MUST BE HARD F0R U, HUH? U L0VED UR EX A L0T, HUH? S0 WAIT HE DUMPED U 0R U DUMPED HIM? O_O;;
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I have AIM and MSN... AIM = xolovelywinterox. MSN = winter_kangta [at] hotmail [dot] com.

I did love him a lot... And he loved me too... None of us dumped each other but I guess I was the one who suggested it. I guess we just agreed it was best that we stopped seeing each other. I mean, it's a long distance relationship and we hardly have time to talk anymore. We only had time to talk for like an hour or lest on Saturdays and Sundays. That was it...

I guess it was the logical thing to do... Lol the both of us have always been more materialistic people... This is for the best and even though we're not happy, it's for the best. My studies have always and will always be the most important thing in my life. I know that, he knows that. Maybe you can call me selfish, but that's what I feel.