did i do the right thing?? Options

[xostolenkissezox]

so i've been hanging out with this guy that i used to date a few years ago. when we dated before it all turned out so bad and he pretty much broke my heart but since it was so long ago i forgave him and just went on with my life. well we've been hanging out again but we both just got outta pretty serious relationships. he's making plans of things to do like all winter so i assumed he plans on sticking around for awhile even if we are just friends. and even though we are, i know there are feelings there between the 2 of us. so tonight i confronted him and told him that i didn't care if we hung out and that i wasn't asking for a relationship right now since we both had just ended relationships of our own but i didn't want to get hurt again and if this whole thing was just a game to him, to end it now and stop talking. he told me he would try his hardest not to hurt me because he doesn't ever want to put me through that again and kissed me. but i'm not so sure i did the right thing by confronting him like that because when we talked on the phone when he got home, he was quiet like he was thinking and he told me i made him think too much...so idk...i'm confused and just wondering if i did the right thing or not...

[1769]

Addressing the relationship aspect the second time around was the right thing to do since it wasn't addressed the first time around. The fact that he said he would "try" is the biggest sign you will receive. You both are tainted by former relationships as well as your own past relationship...how much longer will you keep piling on the extras before the sweetness of the relationship starts to melt or tumble over?

I agree, going back (back-peddling) on past relationships especially on a "try" will only make you cynical further down the road of life. Keep the friendship but loose the hanging out unless it's a group thing. I also agree, the silence you heard on the other end of the phone was him "try"ing to assess his position in the "hanging out" relationship. Remember, a woman's definition of "hanging out" differs completely from a man's version.

Realize what you really want in a relationship, don't settle, keep your goals in mind and wait.