When a child is compared to another.... Options

[Mistress Bags]

I know I'm older and don't live with my mom, but this is something that always held me back as a child, and something that pisses me off to this day.

I hate it when a parent compares her child to somebody else's child. For example: "Ashley, why can't you make better grades? Mrs. Thompson's daughter Lily makes straight A's, and she's not remarkably smart. I don't think you're trying hard enough."

Or..

"Ashley, why can't you keep your room immaculate? Mrs. Thompson NEVER has to tell HER children to clean. You're such a bad child."

People make mistakes. Furthermore, children are not even close to perfect. They're growing into an individual. Instead of comparing their faults to another's strengths, why not be more understanding? If you want your child to make better grades or to clean his/her room more often, try to find a more positive way to do it.

Did anybody have to deal with this when growing up? How do you feel about it?

[leaveheralone]

I get compared all the time, especially to my sister. She was the typical Asian nerd in high school. IB, straight A's. Volunteer work. Room always tidy.

I'm the polar opposite of that.

I'm not my sister. I'm not my mom, either. I don't care if she knew how to cook when she was 7, and if she took care of her sister and brother by the time she was 11. I am not her.

[xlilaznchickx]

I get compared all the time, especially to my sister. She was the typical Asian nerd in high school. IB, straight A's. Volunteer work. Room always tidy.

I'm the polar opposite of that.

I'm not my sister. I'm not my mom, either. I don't care if she knew how to cook when she was 7, and if she took care of her sister and brother by the time she was 11. I am not her.

after reading ur post...where u said ur mom learned how to cook when she was 7..it sounds like my dad saying how to learned how to cook and take care around the house when he's was like younger than me..and its soo annoying whenever he mentions that..