This was a dumb fight...but it's not my fault. Options

[BryMonster]

Okay, so as you guys know, or may not know.
About almost a month ago, I started dating this
girl named Amanda. It's been a really good
relationship. But we just got into a fight over
the dumbest thing. Okay, so my last Rugby
match is on Thursday and I've been wanting
her to come for a long time. She could never
make it because they were so early in the
morning. Thursday, will be the last game
an hour or so after school. So I figured, the
perfect time for her to come to it.

The the dilemma occurs. Her brother has a
baseball game. I was on the phone when she
told me this and I stated simply, "You've gone
to almost all of his games. Just forget this one
and come to mine." And she kind of stayed
quiet. Then she said "I've made up my decision.
I'm going to his. Gotta go. Bye." AND THEN HANGS
UP! WTF?!? How mature was that? I was so
furious. I didn't call her back, I texted her saying
"Way to be rude." & she texts me back with, "Way
to be a jackass." I wasn't trying to be a jackass
intentionally. I've just had a rough day. But still,
the situation could've been handled more maturely.

Now, I'm not going to give in easily. I'm just not like
that. So I'm going to wait until she apologizes. What's
your take on this guys?

[*mipadi*]

I don't think he needs to grovel and be all apologetic. I'm not a huge fan of guys always being the ones that have to apologize in relationships.

Having said that, dude, I was pretty much on your side--right up until the part where you sent the text message. Maybe she wasn't being very mature, but that wasn't very mature, either. I mean, I know you were upset and your feelings were hurt that she wasn't coming to your game, so I'm not trying to say you're a horrible person or anything. It's understandable how you reacted. Waccoon is absolutely right, though, when he suggests that you should apologize for that, and he's right when he suggests that you're being a bit of a jerk by refusing to talk to her.

Relationships are about communication. Say that she does break up with you over something stupid like this. In six months, do you want to say to yourself, "Well, we're broken up now--but at least I didn't break first and call her up to talk about the situation." No, that would just be stupid, and immature.

So basically, I don't think you need to apologize for being upset that she's not coming to your game. That's a reasonable thing to be disappointed about. Of course, apologizing and forgiving are not the same things, even though they are often confused. You might not have to apologize for being upset, but you should forgive her for not being able to come. Maybe she has a good reason, but the only way to figure that out is to talk to her.

Let her know you're disappointed she can't come because you really want her to be there, but listen to her when she tells you why she doesn't want to come. And be the bigger man by talking to her first. Oh, and apologize for sending that text message. It was understandable given the situation but that doesn't make it right, and she should understand that.

And I do think she owes you an apology for abruptly hanging up on you. That wasn't cool, either.