Compulsive Cheater?, looking for advice.. |
 May 11 2006, 06:21 PM
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#1
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 _  Group: Member Posts: 520 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 107,274  |
It really bugs me to have to ask cB for help, but I can't ask my girls and I certainly can't ask my boyfriend.
I've dated this guy for two and a half years. He knows me inside out, accepts my flaws, helped me when I was suicidal, got me through cutting, stays up with me at night. He's my best friend, without question. Last year I cheated on his with someone I knew. The guy I cheated with was a friend, but I wasn't emotionally attached. I started to thing that I wasn't in love with my boyfriend anymore. The combined things put us in a bit of a fight and after two weeks of being apart I realized I was miserable without him. I was lonely and became completely cold hearted. Just honestly cruel and icy to the point that even I was shocked at myself. Plus I realized I was in love with my ex so we talked a lot and I begged and pleaded (oh so humbling) and we got back together. He forgave me (in fact he's friends with the guy) but I've never forgiven myself. So its a year later. My eye started wondering towards another guy (vaguely considered a friend to me) after I had two dreams about cheating with him (while one of my friends watched and smiled no less  ) and just last night I had another dream about cheating on my boyfriend with some other guy (who I don't even like!). I don't know whats going on with me anymore. Is this a phase or something? I'm really starting to worry about myself.
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May 12 2006, 04:42 PM
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#2
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_ Group: Member Posts: 520 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 107,274 |
=) Thanks guys cause everything you say is true. Uronacid, you're kinda right about me wanting something that's lacking in my boyfriend and its one of those things I'll just have to deal with. I did do a lot of thinking and figured a little bit about where this all comes from. We've been dating a long time, we're best friends, and half the school looks to us as some sort of ideal couple meant to last forever. We talk about marriage and a life together and thats all good and well. But we started dating when I was 15. Part of me doesn't want to be with someone for the rest of my life right now. I want to date around and meet other people and not be completely commited to one person, but I don't want to lose my boyfriend. Its really hard to accept that I might have found the one person for me just at a horribly early time in my life. I think the idea of cheating just came as some awful compromise between the two choices. It really comes down to me deciding if I really really really want to commit myself to someone right now. Since we're so close and share so much, I think I'd rather have him and just live with wondering what-if.
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Posts in this topic
[Mediocre]Artist Compulsive Cheater? May 11 2006, 06:21 PM
tainted_angel I think at some point or another, a lot of people ... May 11 2006, 06:50 PM Hiphop d[-_-]b Since you've been noticing other guys you... May 11 2006, 06:51 PM Uronacid alright, to explain your dream... did you talk abo... May 11 2006, 07:49 PM
[Mediocre]Artist QUOTE(Uronacid @ May 11 2006, 7:49 PM) al... May 11 2006, 08:17 PM xbabyboo Wow..I think you should think about being single o... May 11 2006, 08:15 PM Uronacid but did you tell anyone that you were thinking abo... May 11 2006, 08:32 PM [Mediocre]Artist QUOTE(Uronacid @ May 11 2006, 8:32 PM) bu... May 11 2006, 08:41 PM oX_Muh_Nirvana_Xo Its hard I know. I took me a week with out my bf a... May 11 2006, 08:35 PM Uronacid do you know who the person was that is staring at ... May 11 2006, 09:02 PM Paradox of Life Basically, you're being selfish. You just want... May 11 2006, 09:10 PM Uronacid QUOTE(Paradox of Life @ May 11 2006, 10:1... May 11 2006, 09:12 PM Paradox of Life ^QUOTELast year I cheated on his with someone I kn... May 11 2006, 09:17 PM [Mediocre]Artist *sigh* Paradox is just saying the harsh truth that... May 11 2006, 09:42 PM This Confession well no one get mad at uronacid.
sheesh
Anyway i... May 12 2006, 12:48 AM yanners I personally think that maybe the two of you need ... May 12 2006, 04:29 AM My Cinderella. It seems to me that you're having trouble find... May 12 2006, 06:26 AM Uronacid alright, ill give you my best advice, and ill give... May 12 2006, 08:46 AM Mini I think you're just taking him for granted. We... May 12 2006, 09:51 AM Uronacid yeah im really intrested in what she thinks of my ... May 12 2006, 10:37 AM Uronacid i completely understand how you feel May 13 2006, 10:40 PM agiri honestly, i think you're beginning to take you... May 14 2006, 02:21 PM xmoon_lightx If i were you i would stick with him. Hes been the... May 14 2006, 07:48 PM |
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