Do you misuse the word 'gay'?, What do you think about people that do? Options

[*Teenage Mutant Ninja Meg*]

I messed up the poll again... so, if you want to vote for the first one, just post it in a reply. Or one of the mods can fix it.

Personally, I find people who use the word "gay" to mean stupid is incredibly offensive. When a person says something like "THAT'S SO GAY!", I swear a blood vessel pops in my head. And when I bring it up with my friends, they say things like, "I have gay friends and they say it too!" Well, your gay friends are the only homosexuals in the whole world.

Anyway, what do you think of it? You obviously know my answer.

[I hope this is in the proper forum, if not feel free to move it!]

[hi-C]

^ Well, yeah, I know that, but you're equating gay with stupid. You don't think that's offensive?

[flc]

^ Well, yeah, I know that, but you're equating gay with stupid. You don't think that's offensive?

I'm not calling gay people stupid. What I meant that, seperate from homosexual, in today's society gay has taken on a different meaning, like how it meant happy back then. I am in no way linking homosexuality with stupidity, and people shouldn't see it that way either.

People are getting WAY too sensitive these days..

[*I Shot JFK*]

I'm not calling gay people stupid. What I meant that, seperate from homosexual, in today's society gay has taken on a different meaning, like how it meant happy back then. I am in no way linking homosexuality with stupidity, and people shouldn't see it that way either.

People are getting WAY too sensitive these days..

so, if someone is offended by what you say, it is entirely teir fault for being to sensitive, and you have no responsiblity to adapt to their offense?

[flc]

so, if someone is offended by what you say, it is entirely teir fault for being to sensitive, and you have no responsiblity to adapt to their offense?

Yeah. That's pretty much it. I might sound like an a-hole, but they have to get over it. It's not like I use the word gay after every word I say. THAT would get annoying. I only use it when something really bothers me, which isn't that often.

But most likely, this person who is getting offended isn't my friend and someone I would never have to see or talk to again. Because if I know my friends well, they wouldn't get so angry over a stupid word. If it was someone I truly cared about, and they gave me a REALLY good explanation for why it bothered them, then I would of course stop using it around them.

Because like mo rox said, most gays don't care. Then it IS that person's fault for being too sensitive. Because other gays could just say, "Hey, it isn't that big of a deal."

[*I Shot JFK*]

Yeah. That's pretty much it. I might sound like an a-hole, but they have to get over it. It's not like I use the word gay after every word I say. THAT would get annoying. I only use it when something really bothers me, which isn't that often.

But most likely, this person who is getting offended isn't my friend and someone I would never have to see or talk to again. Because if I know my friends well, they wouldn't get so angry over a stupid word. If it was someone I truly cared about, and they gave me a REALLY good explanation for why it bothered them, then I would of course stop using it around them.

Because like mo rox said, most gays don't care. Then it IS that person's fault for being too sensitive. Because other gays could just say, "Hey, it isn't that big of a deal."

you're a charmer, arent you?

so, one person's opinion is invalid because it is more sensitive than the majority? why wait to find someone it truly offends? why not use a term which doesnt make you sound ignorant?

Then why do people use words like f*ck and and b*tch. Why don't you guys feel offended for female dogs because we call other people b*tches? By being so sensitive for gay people, you are seperating them from us even more. They're the same people, but it seems like gay people have to be more offended by such things, when they're not even talking about them.

the point about bitch was just stupid. as if you cant tell the distinction. as far as f**k goes, i take your point, but my feelings regarding 'gay' isn't so much because the word is offensive in itself, but because it is specifically derogatory towards one group of people. surely, it is better to seperate a group by being sensitive towards them than by using their label in a derogatory way?

As someone said and I have said, there are multiple meanings. Society now gave it perhaps its third meaning, stupidity. Would you think someone back in the day that said, "I am gay," misused the word and offended gay people?

no, because the use of gay to mean happy predates the use of it to mean homosexual. to expect a cease in the use of it to mean happy would be unreasonable. but it is not unreasonable to expect people to be more sensitive now that it DOES have conotations with a sector of society, i do no find it acceptable for the 'third meaning' to evolve.

Um...but it's different. "Hey, nigger," is a greeting. "That's so GAY" is describing something. If you're going to compare, it's like, "Hey gay girl/guy!" And seriously how many people actually greet you like that?

could you REALLY not see the paralell that she was trying to draw? you've missed her point utterly by that response.

...And somehow, calling them stupid is not worse than calling them gay? Have you ever thought of when "stupid" actually offended people? Until people understood that it is not actually a big deal, and that people don't actually MEAN that you are stupid?

well obviously the word stupid will cause offense to th eperson it is directed towards. but there is not a clear third party who could ALSO take offense, and that makes the difference.

*******

a question for those who find the term to be acceptable: what are your feelings towards people who use 'fag' as an insult? they may or may not mean it to mean 'homosexual', but it still cast a negative light upon people who are actually gay, by implying that their lifestyle is something to be ashamed of, and to direct at people you wish to offend

[crazeegirl411]

the point about bitch was just stupid. as if you cant tell the distinction. as far as f**k goes, i take your point, but my feelings regarding 'gay' isn't so much because the word is offensive in itself, but because it is specifically derogatory towards one group of people. surely, it is better to seperate a group by being sensitive towards them than by using their label in a derogatory way?

Excuse me. Don't give your opinions about what's stupid or not. At least have something to back up why you think it's stupid. There isn't much of a difference, but instead, you just target it at the word "gay." Have I not said already that the people that use it do not use it while thinking of that certain group of people? Being sensitive towards them only means you are thinking of them differently rather than treating them like the same as everyone else.

no, because the use of gay to mean happy predates the use of it to mean homosexual. to expect a cease in the use of it to mean happy would be unreasonable. but it is not unreasonable to expect people to be more sensitive now that it DOES have conotations with a sector of society, i do no find it acceptable for the 'third meaning' to evolve.

That's even more unreasonable than the people that use the word "gay" to describe things or people that are stupid. Meanwhile you are probably accepting other words that have evolved, but you cannot accept the third meaning of gay because you are being sensitive. Which brings back to the first part where you are thinking of them differently rather than treating them like the same kind of people.

could you REALLY not see the paralell that she was trying to draw? you've missed her point utterly by that response.

Then you have missed my point utterly. It is NOT parallel because she is putting a greeting with an adjective. "Hi Nigger" and "That's so gay," is a completely different way to use the word "nigger" and "gay."

well obviously the word stupid will cause offense to th eperson it is directed towards. but there is not a clear third party who could ALSO take offense, and that makes the difference.

Do you ever stop saying something completely just because someone takes offense to it? Ever?

a question for those who find the term to be acceptable: what are your feelings towards people who use 'fag' as an insult? they may or may not mean it to mean 'homosexual', but it still cast a negative light upon people who are actually gay, by implying that their lifestyle is something to be ashamed of, and to direct at people you wish to offend

Same for people that use fag. How many people actually think the person it is directed upon is described as homosexual? The people that actually think homosexuals are different, thinks of it. It is the same kind of name calling with b*tch. To you, obviously from what you have written at the very start, it is different. How is it different? It is directed to a certain group also. Are you viewing gay people differently?

For example, let's say someone lost his leg due to a car accident. It is right to be sensitive about it. But if someone jokes around about it, it doesn't mean that person is meaning to offend the person that lost his leg. It means he is not even thinking about it and treating him like he is just a normal person.

[*I Shot JFK*]

Excuse me. Don't give your opinions about what's stupid or not. At least have something to back up why you think it's stupid. There isn't much of a difference, but instead, you just target it at the word "gay." Have I not said already that the people that use it do not use it while thinking of that certain group of people? Being sensitive towards them only means you are thinking of them differently rather than treating them like the same as everyone else.

That's even more unreasonable than the people that use the word "gay" to describe things or people that are stupid. Meanwhile you are probably accepting other words that have evolved, but you cannot accept the third meaning of gay because you are being sensitive. Which brings back to the first part where you are thinking of them differently rather than treating them like the same kind of people.

Then you have missed my point utterly. It is NOT parallel because she is putting a greeting with an adjective. "Hi Nigger" and "That's so gay," is a completely different way to use the word "nigger" and "gay."

Do you ever stop saying something completely just because someone takes offense to it? Ever?
Same for people that use fag. How many people actually think the person it is directed upon is described as homosexual? The people that actually think homosexuals are different, thinks of it. It is the same kind of name calling with b*tch. To you, obviously from what you have written at the very start, it is different. How is it different? It is directed to a certain group also. Are you viewing gay people differently?

For example, let's say someone lost his leg due to a car accident. It is right to be sensitive about it. But if someone jokes around about it, it doesn't mean that person is meaning to offend the person that lost his leg. It means he is not even thinking about it and treating him like he is just a normal person.

well, you said am i worried about 'bitch' offending female dogs...

Then why do people use words like f*ck and and b*tch. Why don't you guys feel offended for female dogs because we call other people b*tches?

that IS just stupid, as well as childish, because it is a trivial, non sensical point, as female dogs are not capable of feeling offended by it... you are equating the emotions of an animal with that of a human being. I certainly feel that that is justification enough for saying it was a stupid point. It was a ridiculou thing to say

- yea, i accept other words that evolved... thats the point. but this one has a predefinition (word?) which makes the third definition offensive. that is the difference between it and othe rnew slang.

- no no... i understood your point, it just wasnt very good. its STILL the same thing, because it is the casual use of a word which may offend... are you honestly too dense to see that?

- to be honest, i cant think of a word which i use frequently which could be offensive to a group of people... if someone could give me a reasobale explanation of why it was offensive, then yes, i would try as much as possible to break that habit.

- cant be botherd to row about fag, because its the same argument over again.

Heh, I guess I will talk with you some more then.

And you patronized me as well, saying, "You're a charmer, aren't you?" Just to let you know.

I won't stop because I see no need to. I usually don't say it outside of school, where there are like, what, two gays who I don't talk to anyway. I could understand what you're saying if I was constantly saying it in a different setting, where there could be tons of gays around. But really. Rarely do I actually say it when a gay person is there.

It's just a three-letter word. I know words can be powerful, but actions DO speak louder than words. If you knew me in real life, you'd know that I respect gays as much as the next guy. Since people know this, they're not going to give me a hard time about using this word.

And why do I wait? BECAUSE IT DOESN'T BOTHER ANYONE I SAY IT AROUND. It seems to be bothering you more than it would a gay person, at least at this moment.

And do you know how arrogant that sounds? Especially with saying that you'll harrass people until they stop saying it? That sounds JUST like my Atheist friend who argues with every Christian around him, trying to get them to denounce their religion. I bet your friends stopped saying not because they finally understood it was wrong, but because they didn't wanna get anymore crap from you.

Let's say, for instance, that gays didn't actually get offended by the use of this word. Just because YOU find it distasteful, you have to make everyone else think the same way you do?

I know you didn't see this part of my post, because you quoted me after I edited it, but I'm just curious: Example: I could, personally, find your username offensive. I could say you're treating Kennedy's assasination as a joke. Just because I alone could find it offensive, are you going to change your username to please one person? Probably not. But I wouldn't keep bugging the hell out of you to change it. I would accept it and move on with my life, like that person should who got offended. They need to realize that a lot of things in life are offensive and they can't get their way with everything everytime. {Even though when I say that something is gay I'm not meaning to calling gay people stupid, like I've said 33586974 times.}

So please, just stop. I have full respect for what you're saying, even if I don't sound like it. But with me, at least, it's a losing battle. Go harrass those other people who also said they use the word.

oh good, i like this conversation.

that wasnt intended to be patronizing, really... sorry if you took it that way. i was just expressing dislike for what you said.

well, see, i think there is a fundamental difference in our philosophies. i see it as my responsibility not to give offense. you see it as others responsibility not to take offense. it boils down to that. it jsut seems stupid to me to acknowledge that something has the potential to cause offense, and then not bother to stop in advance.

i am arrogant, i have a very high opinion of myself, a big ego, and im agressive with my opinions. i make no apologies for it. and frankly, i could care less why they stopped. its all a means to an end, either way.

interesting. see, i can see where you;re going, but the difference to me is that with gay, or nigger, or what have you, there is a spefiic, ready made sector who could potentially be offended, and you see it coming. with my user name, i dont see a strong potential for offense. if it is one person, then yeah, probably i wouldn't be that fussed, because there is no argument which says it is personally degrading, or attaches negative conotations to them. plus, of course, i really did shoot jfk, so it is neither here nor there.

oh, i dont let things go. ever. getting me to stop is an equally losing battle. and i have an equal respect for what you say. 'I may not agree with what you have to say, but I will defend to your death the right to say it'. <--- words i live by