Createblog Diary, Version 8.0 |
| *stephinika* |
 Mar 26 2006, 03:27 PM
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#1
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originally started by faithin_felix.
You guys know how it works. Dear CB diary, Wow, it's been awhile since I've been in here. Europe was absolutely amazing, but I'm sad to be home. I missed my own bed and Adrian but other than that...I want to go back. I miss it so much. Now that I'm home, there's so much stress and so many stupid things to do...ugh, its driving me crazy. Fiddler practice yesterday was so frustrating because people are so stupid. At least I saw Adrian. That was absolutely wonderful. I love just being with him. I missed him so much. It made me so happy that he came to the airport to see me when I got back. It was a lovely surprise. It really was. Got sick when I got home though for a few days which really sucked. I'm feeling better now though...still tired. I want to see him again. I can't help being so...attached. I just love being with him and everything so much. We need to makeup for the time I wasn't here... |
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Replies
| *jooleeah* |
Apr 12 2006, 02:20 PM
Post
#2
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dear cb diary,
i hate it when i'm in this kind of mood. i hate being f**king introspective. and i hate thinking about the damned past. i hate feeling lonely. all the f**king time. uhg. you know, i finally realized why i've never had a serious boyfriend. it's because i'm too damned scared. scared that once he finds out that i'm not just that silly/friendly girl everyone thinks i am. scared that he's gonna find out that i'm just really a cold, mean, and bitchy girl on the inside. no boy could EVER prepare for that part of me. when i wish i just had someone to talk to, to be held, to be loved and all that shit, i realize that that's not reality. i don't think i'll ever find someone like that. it's seeming like it's impossible now. sucks, doesn't it? you know what else sucks? pretending to be happy for someone else. and you know what else? these damned people keep on f**king bothering me to be "happy". i can't be happy if you're going to complain about how shitty i feel. i can't be happy if you keep on TRYING to f**king piss me off. i can't feel goddamned happy if you make fun of me. just shut the f**k up and leave me the f**k alone. youknow, i look at all these girls at school when theyre passing by me through the hallways with their boyfriends. most of them are just whores and sluts [i use that word rarely] who go out with a different guy each day. what makes them so lovable? what makes them good enough to go out with? what makes them be good enough for their hands to be held, for the bodies to be hugged, for their boyfriends to say "i love you" to them each and every single day? am i just the kind of person who doesn't deserve that kind of stuff? am i not as lovable as they are? i'll admit it. i am jealous. but who wouldn't be when you're feelnig this damned lonely? why can't i get that feeling where you like someone? i haven't liked someone in so long. what am i goddamned waiting for? nothing, i guess. i just don't find anyone i know around me interesting enough to like. no, it's not that. it's just..i don't like anyone. and it really sucks. AHSDKFHSDKHSDFKH. i'm so bitter. it's terrible, isn't it? whatever. i'm just ranting and being bitchy right now. i'll come back later. |
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Posts in this topic
stephinika Createblog Diary Mar 26 2006, 03:27 PM
lolita kitty dear cb diary,
yesterday was so fun.
i wont type ... Mar 26 2006, 03:53 PM Phoenixx Dear Cb Diary,
Lately I have been very tired and... Mar 26 2006, 03:57 PM jooleeah dear createblog diary,
i hate knowing that i'l... Mar 26 2006, 09:27 PM Teesa Dear CB Diary,
So, not much has changed since my ... Mar 27 2006, 01:58 AM stephinika Dear CB Diary,
God I love him. I keep having funn... Mar 29 2006, 01:19 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
I'm so happy that April is ri... Mar 29 2006, 01:25 PM xoxo_koala_kisses_ Dear CB Diary,
SOMEBODY ASKED ME TO PROM. Mar 29 2006, 04:22 PM chaneun Dear cB diary:
I want to move out.. now. I don... Mar 30 2006, 07:50 PM x__Elle. Dear cB Diary,
My birthday's in five days. =)... Mar 30 2006, 07:56 PM stephinika Dear cB diary,
Not now. Not today. I did NOT need... Mar 30 2006, 09:29 PM tic tac. Dear cB diary,
So, today sucked. SHE was flirting... Mar 30 2006, 09:44 PM jooleeah dear cb diary,
no.
i can't.
i won't.
but i... Mar 30 2006, 09:51 PM silver rain Dear CB Diary,
Meh. Today wasn't such a great... Mar 30 2006, 10:21 PM Angelina Taylor Dear cb diary:
I wish he cared.. I really do. Eve... Apr 1 2006, 11:04 AM Teesa Dear CB Diary,
This spring break flew by so fast ... Apr 1 2006, 10:48 PM jooleeah Dear Createblog Diary,
Legs ache.
Tired.
Sick of p... Apr 1 2006, 11:42 PM M1SSxCHR1SSY Julia, I freaking love you. Talk to me if you feel... Apr 2 2006, 03:43 PM Flavored Condom Dear CB diary,
I'm using my brother's com... Apr 3 2006, 06:44 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
It's April, and as sad as I ca... Apr 4 2006, 11:03 AM jooleeah Chrissy, I love you more. Same to you if you'r... Apr 4 2006, 07:57 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
I should be having the time of my ... Apr 4 2006, 11:38 PM stephinika Dear cB diary,
Why am I so constantly paranoid? W... Apr 5 2006, 01:15 AM lilxl0ser dear cB,
it's been awhile huh? well, nothing n... Apr 6 2006, 08:46 PM hello moto dear cb diary,
i know this feeling all too well. ... Apr 8 2006, 02:15 AM I own yourr face. Dear cb Diary,
I'm such a dork. I need to get... Apr 8 2006, 02:41 AM jooleeah auntysandy: because boys suck. :[ the end. i love ... Apr 8 2006, 11:32 AM YoGrandpaIsFine Dear cB Diary,
Spring break! Anyway, the sch... Apr 8 2006, 10:08 PM jooleeah dear cb diary,
it amazes me how sometimes i spill ... Apr 8 2006, 11:02 PM M1SSxCHR1SSY Dear cB Diary,
Needless to say, I'm totally c... Apr 9 2006, 02:34 AM lolita kitty Dear Cb Diary.
I hate the feeling of being new to... Apr 10 2006, 12:26 AM rtc_nospeakenglish While walking to Church today with my phony mother... Apr 10 2006, 12:30 AM lilxl0ser dear cB,
i'm a terrible person. no really i am... Apr 10 2006, 10:08 PM M1SSxCHR1SSY Dear cB diary,
I can't stop crying. Please, I... Apr 10 2006, 11:17 PM lolita kitty Chrissy
Ilu.
Dear cb diary,
I found this on mys... Apr 10 2006, 11:57 PM viola_winnie Dear cB diary,
i cant finish a simple step!ju... Apr 11 2006, 05:46 AM maryissa Dear cB diary,
Afaid. Suckness Spring Break Ever... Apr 11 2006, 03:31 PM Teesa Dear CB Diary,
Hello. I guess right now, I am doi... Apr 12 2006, 05:46 PM jooleeah Dear Createblog Diary,
So, yeah. I feel better now... Apr 12 2006, 09:32 PM viola_winnie Dear Createblog Diary,
i feel quite.........since... Apr 12 2006, 10:25 PM stephinika Dear cB diary...
Augh. I hate this. I'm the m... Apr 13 2006, 03:45 PM jennypie dear cB diary,
Last night was so, so, so amazing.... Apr 14 2006, 04:04 PM lolita kitty Dear cb diary,
I can't f**king take this. My ... Apr 16 2006, 01:08 AM jooleeah dear cb diary,
i have no courage. haha. jose's... Apr 16 2006, 02:44 PM lilxl0ser dear cB,
as i find my world slowly rising to the p... Apr 16 2006, 10:37 PM jooleeah dear cb diary,
so i came home early today because ... Apr 17 2006, 11:10 AM mzkandi Dear Cb,
Today begins a new chapter of our lives.... Apr 17 2006, 02:08 PM Zatanna Dear cB,
The recurring theme of my life lately is... Apr 17 2006, 05:40 PM jooleeah Dear Createblog Diary,
I am the most selfish perso... Apr 17 2006, 10:07 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
I jumped to conclusions as I alway... Apr 18 2006, 01:47 PM M1SSxCHR1SSY Naomi,
I love you. Boys are stupid. I know you... Apr 18 2006, 06:18 PM stephinika Dear cB diary,
I really hate school sometimes. I ... Apr 19 2006, 06:28 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
I've made up my mind. I have t... Apr 20 2006, 05:33 PM jooleeah Dear Createblog Diary,
I'm empty. Hmmmmm. Apr 20 2006, 07:43 PM M1SSxCHR1SSY Dear cB Diary,
What the hell am I doing? UGH. Wha... Apr 21 2006, 07:22 PM jooleeah Dear Createblog Diary,
This is pathetic. I'm p... Apr 21 2006, 07:26 PM stephinika Dear cB diary,
Why? Why does this all have to hap... Apr 21 2006, 08:41 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
After a good cry last night (darn ... Apr 22 2006, 03:26 PM jooleeah Dear cB diary,
I know, that by the end of this wee... Apr 24 2006, 03:37 PM helllla jankyyyy Dear cB diary,
its been a while huh? well i have ... Apr 24 2006, 05:51 PM Intoxique Dear cB Diary,
I wanna break down & cry. I ca... Apr 24 2006, 07:54 PM jooleeah dear cb diary,
i am so tired of getting the f**kin... Apr 25 2006, 09:56 PM Days Nearly Over cbdiary,
I hate this feeling of emptiness. I real... Apr 26 2006, 06:59 PM elainedcuzunome dear cb diary,
why did that b*tch end up with hi... Apr 26 2006, 10:39 PM Kathleen Dear cB diary,
NO ONE READ "ALTRUISM" AN... Apr 27 2006, 10:17 PM islandgirl4eva ^^ The writing forum is a lot more inactive now.
... Apr 28 2006, 12:48 AM lolita kitty Dear cb diary.
Good day. bad afternoon.
I started... Apr 28 2006, 03:33 PM jooleeah dear cb diary,
there must be something seriously w... Apr 29 2006, 08:02 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
This is going to sound so superfic... Apr 30 2006, 11:58 PM M1SSxCHR1SSY Julia, Naomi
Dear createBlog Diary,
Want to kn... May 1 2006, 02:19 AM elainedcuzunome Dear cB Diary,
this year has been cruel to me. i ... May 1 2006, 03:43 PM Days Nearly Over dear cbdiary...
i am not sure but...
i think i a... May 2 2006, 09:44 PM priyas Dear CB Diary,
Today we talked. It was so awesome... May 2 2006, 10:49 PM stephinika Dear cB diary,
I'm so sick of just about ever... May 2 2006, 11:42 PM elainedcuzunome Dear cB diary,
today was one of the worst days of... May 3 2006, 02:12 PM priyas Dear CB Diary,
So much drama in 1 school day. I f... May 3 2006, 07:52 PM Statues/Shadows I AM SO motherf**king SICK OF HEARING ABOUT PROM
... May 4 2006, 03:41 PM stephinika Dear cB diary,
So today was pretty effed up. It s... May 4 2006, 06:38 PM emazing Dear cB diary,
Eee. I keep on procrastinating ab... May 5 2006, 11:54 AM jooleeah thanks chrissy
dear cb diary,
i feel uneasy. lik... May 5 2006, 05:01 PM priyas I AM IN LOVE. END OF STORY. May 6 2006, 12:55 AM stephinika Dear cB diary...
Why is it whenever I have a good... May 6 2006, 01:41 AM helllla jankyyyy ^ Feel better n remember you can talk to me.
Dear... May 6 2006, 02:06 AM silver rain Dear cb Diary,
Blah, there's only about 26 mo... May 6 2006, 12:14 PM stephinika Thanks Lo.
Dear cB diary...
I'm feeling bet... May 6 2006, 01:28 PM YoGrandpaIsFine Dear cB Diary,
One more month. :\ I don... May 6 2006, 10:30 PM Teesa Dear CB Diary,
Well, this is the home stretch. Fi... May 6 2006, 10:55 PM jooleeah Dear Createblog Diary,
It's sad when I need so... May 6 2006, 11:05 PM islandgirl4eva ^^ Julia, love...it's because people are idiot... May 6 2006, 11:29 PM dancingkait dear cb diary
so he came over last night and we h... May 7 2006, 01:19 PM waccoon I loooove Christa. May 7 2006, 01:20 PM
marzipan QUOTE(waccoon @ May 7 2006, 1:20 PM) I lo... May 7 2006, 01:21 PM waccoon QUOTE(marzipan @ May 7 2006, 2:21 PM) ...... May 7 2006, 01:23 PM marzipan QUOTE(waccoon @ May 7 2006, 1:23 PM) Um w... May 7 2006, 01:24 PM tainted_angel Dear cB Diary,
Well, he's here. He came home ... May 7 2006, 01:36 PM oX_Muh_Nirvana_Xo Dear Cb Diary,
These past few days with h... May 7 2006, 02:54 PM lilxl0ser dear cB,
i'm tired. eeeks! i'm just ti... May 7 2006, 08:55 PM jooleeah Naomi, I know. :[ I hate it when people like them ... May 7 2006, 10:21 PM islandgirl4eva Dear cB diary,
I find that cleaning makes me happ... May 9 2006, 02:15 PM |
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