Createblog Diary, Version 8.0 |
Createblog Diary, Version 8.0 |
*stephinika* |
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#1
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originally started by faithin_felix.
You guys know how it works. Dear CB diary, Wow, it's been awhile since I've been in here. Europe was absolutely amazing, but I'm sad to be home. I missed my own bed and Adrian but other than that...I want to go back. I miss it so much. Now that I'm home, there's so much stress and so many stupid things to do...ugh, its driving me crazy. Fiddler practice yesterday was so frustrating because people are so stupid. At least I saw Adrian. That was absolutely wonderful. I love just being with him. I missed him so much. It made me so happy that he came to the airport to see me when I got back. It was a lovely surprise. It really was. Got sick when I got home though for a few days which really sucked. I'm feeling better now though...still tired. I want to see him again. I can't help being so...attached. I just love being with him and everything so much. We need to makeup for the time I wasn't here... |
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*stephinika* |
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#2
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Dear cB diary,
Why am I so constantly paranoid? Why godammit, why!? Fxck. I hate seeing him like this and feeling there's something he's not telling me...he promised me there's nothing and I trust him and that I'm just being stupid again but augh...I just keep getting that feeling, y'know? Then I see her tonight...I act nice but I want to just kill her. Then I saw those pictures...I feel like crying again. I've already talked to him about it and there's no point in this but I can't help it. I don't want to be like this! I hate being like this...it makes me so hateful, and angry and sad and it makes me hate MYSELF because I can't stand thinking and acting like this. Fcuk paranoid. Fxck it. Honestly. I just wish all could be well. Then I'm so stressed about school right now. I hate school. I really, really do. I just want to run away with him and be carefree. Really. I hope he actually likes the surprise I got him and that it all works out...I'm so impatient. I can't wait until August now. Ack. I need a vacation. I need him. I need to feel secure. |
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