bf broke up with me..., so confused.... Options

[lilnatcat]

my bf went overseas holiday for 1 month, and in that 1 month he never came online so we could'nt talk to each other... we had just passed valentines day, our 3 months and 100 days......

he came back last sunday, and broke up with me a few days ago on thursday.....

i asked him for a reason and he told me that "university's starting.... and i have to go to university monday to friday... i don't have any time" coz both of us are at different universities...... but we live really close to each other.....

i asked him if there was any way we could turn back and he just shook his head....
i was really shocked and didn't know what else to say or ask.... coz at that time i was trying my best to hold my tears back... i started sniffing a lot trying to hold those tears back.... he asked "r u ok? do u want me to walk u home?" he seemed to still really care about me....

On Friday, i went to his house to give back the sketchbook i borrowed off him, which i had drawn something in it and had a message in it.... the letter i wrote when he was overseas....... and the letter i wrote on the same friday morning


I asked him if he ever loved me, and he said that he did but the feeling's all gone.
I was really upset, I don't know if he's lying or not..... because would'nt he have told me that yesterday when i asked for the reason for the break up? It seemed so sudden when he said it to my face...... and his frd says that it doesn't seem like him to do such a thing like that

But what i'm so confused about it, when he told me that he had no feelings for me anymore the day AFTER we broke up was he lying? did something force him to make that choice? or was it for the sake of university that he decided to give up on me? he's a great guy, he's done so many sweet things, I always wanted to cry at the time he did each of those things but held it al back coz i didn't want to show him that i was actually fragile and sensitive on the inside. i always thought that i was a strong person on the inside and outside, but i guess......... on the inside its not strong at all........

I'm really upset..... eversince thursday, i've been crying a lot......... So many things remind me of him..........i can't help it but cry..... and i have to wait infront of the park he broke up with me for the bus to get to my university......for the next 4 yrs.............. the park is really close to both of our houses.....

I hope all of you can give me ur opinions and what u think................. i really appreciate it if u read all of this till the end and give me some advice.... because.... i consider him as my 1st bf eventhough he isn't.... what makes me say that is because he's the very very first guy i actually love.... and i do mean it... i've never felt so emotional and painful in my whole life before. I don't think I would ever know what love is if I never met him......

[NgocQuyen]

^awwh that is the sweetest advise...

i agree. i think that he must've had some sort of feelings for you or he wouldn't have gone out with you in the first place. maybe he feels that you two going to different universities is too much. even though he told you those feelings were all gone, i'm sure they can't really be ALL gone...you have to cross his mind one day or another. sometimes things happen for a reason. maybe this was meant to be you know? you just have to think of it that way...i mean there was this guy that liked me and i let myself fall for him as well, and in the end he tried to break my heart. and if it wasn't for him, i would have never gotten so close to the guy i like now...and i would have never discovered how nice and caring he was. soo yeah...i mean one of the reasons why it's so hard for you to let go, i think, is because you're not letting yourself let go. just breathe for a moment, and try not to think about it so much. maybe one day he will come back in your life, but sometimes you just got to give it time. and if he doesn't, you don't need to wait around for him forever. i wouldn't even advise waiting for him right now...just go out and be free..don't let one heartbreak keep you from finding the right one. hope you feel better sweetie