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Change is inevitable, right?
me1issaaaa
post Jan 29 2006, 09:51 PM
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So, I really don't know who to talk to about this. I don't really want to tell my mom, because I don't want her to hate him and say, "I told you so". I don't know what to say to my best friend, because she's never been in this situation. ANd I can't talk to Drew, because... the problem is him and he just doesn't understand where I'm coming from. So I'm at the point to where I really don't care anymore, I'm so confused.


For the last year and three weeks, my boyfriend Drew and I have been happier than I could have ever imagined. Everything was just amazing in every way, and I thought we were both actually the perfect couple together.

Friday afternoon, he called like he always does, everything's fine, we're just a little tired because it's Friday. Then I don't hear from him until around 11 that night. He calls, I answer the phone, and he says "We need to talk". And you know it's not good after that.

He said he wants space. The thing is... he's 700 miles away. (How much more space does a person need?) He says he wants to hang out with his friends until 4 in the morning like he used to before his accident Backtrack: in October, he was in an accident and was hospitalized. Ever since then, though he's completely recovered, he hasn't been the same person; It's like he's not as attentive, he doesn't show the same emotions, he had been lying to me about stupid things. All of that.

We were just so happy that I guess we figured that we would be together forever. I mean, as stupid as it sounds, we really did think it would turn out that way. But now he doesn't want to talk about our future, our marriage, the fact that we're engaged now, our children we had hoped to have, any of it. He says he doesn't want to think about the future because he can't guarentee that any of it will happen. I understand where he's coming from, but I'm the type of person who wants to talk about those things because God knows I would drop everything and marry that boy tomorrow. I want to spend the rest of my life with him, and it kills me to know that he has the slightest bit of doubt about it all.

After I had been crying all that night and most of the day after, he called around 3 that afternoon and wanted to say that he didn't mean it the way he said it. He doesn't want to break up, but he doesn't want to have the responsibility to call every single night. I understand that he doesn't have to, but why wouldn't he want to?

I suppose I pretty much shot myself in the foot for this one. I've basically rearranged my entire life to fit around his schedule because all I want to do is talk to him, and I don't really think that's healthy.




So... do you think I brought this upon myself? Any advice?


I have never felt so utterly confused. A little embracement or something would help. I hope someone understands what I'm trying to say.
 
 
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creamyxlicious
post Feb 16 2006, 12:36 AM
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"space" is a weird word. It's probably just me but that word, I feel like everytime I hear it being used it turns out to be a lame way of saying "I don't want to deal with this". So I feel an invisable negative ura around that word like the ura around the word "we need to talk".

Happened to one of my friends and my ex used that line
(I thought you wanted "space") as an excuse to run away from me too..

But I hope for the best for your situation.
Maybe he's just trying to sort things out of his head..
 

Posts in this topic
xoxo_koala_kisses_   Change is inevitable, right?   Jan 29 2006, 09:51 PM
_sarcastic_   i hope you feel better soon i kinda do know how y...   Jan 29 2006, 10:15 PM
K!$$   QUOTE(_sarcastic_ @ Jan 30 2006, 10:15 AM)......   Jan 30 2006, 03:55 AM
_sarcastic_   QUOTE(K!$$ @ Jan 30 2006, 3:55 ...   Jan 30 2006, 06:54 AM
Hiphop d[-_-]b   I dont think you brought this upon yourself, but y...   Jan 29 2006, 11:30 PM
pastellove_   QUOTE(Hiphop d[-_-]b @ Jan...   Jan 30 2006, 01:46 AM
mipadi   I don't think it's that he never wants to ...   Jan 30 2006, 12:33 AM
Zatanna   I'm so sorry that you're going through thi...   Jan 30 2006, 01:20 AM
Programmer   well..i was cheering for you guys...from the get g...   Jan 30 2006, 07:57 AM
mipadi   QUOTE(Programmer @ Jan 30 2006, 7:57 AM)well....   Jan 30 2006, 09:35 AM
Programmer   QUOTE(mipadi @ Jan 30 2006, 9:35 AM)I disagre...   Jan 30 2006, 09:38 AM
mipadi   QUOTE(Programmer @ Jan 30 2006, 9:38 AM)liste...   Jan 30 2006, 09:43 AM
upf147   truthfully, i dont understand long distance relati...   Jan 30 2006, 05:13 PM
xnofearx   QUOTE(upf147 @ Jan 30 2006, 5:13 PM)truthfull...   Jan 30 2006, 05:22 PM
xoxo_koala_kisses_   QUOTE(upf147 @ Jan 30 2006, 6:13 PM)truthfull...   Jan 30 2006, 08:08 PM
Rachel is love   QUOTE(xoxo_koala_kisses_ @ Jan 30 2006, 7:08 ...   Feb 9 2006, 02:32 PM
not_your_average   Melissa, you didn't bring this upon yourself. ...   Jan 30 2006, 08:22 PM
priyas   maybe you have high expectations of him according ...   Feb 1 2006, 01:34 AM
FoxBandCutie08   Sounds like he's just having some doubts about...   Feb 8 2006, 07:39 PM
xoxo_koala_kisses_   So as you probably know by now, we broke up on Sun...   Feb 14 2006, 07:44 PM
islandgirl4eva   Has he told you not to talk to him? Lik, to try to...   Feb 14 2006, 07:47 PM
xoxo_koala_kisses_   No, he's never done anything like that. When w...   Feb 14 2006, 07:57 PM
swtcherriipie   Sometimes change comes when it is un-wanted.... =...   Feb 14 2006, 08:01 PM
creamyxlicious   "space" is a weird word. It's probab...   Feb 16 2006, 12:36 AM
xoxo_koala_kisses_   Okay, thanks everyone for your opinions, but... ...   Feb 16 2006, 08:23 PM


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