Meaning of life Options

[*mipadi*]

Lately I've felt myself in a nihilistic quandary, a Nietzchean void of chaos and uncertainty, if you will. I feel like this insecurity is due to the fact that my life seems almost complete devoid of meaning. I wake up most mornings around 7 AM. I take a shower. I have a cup of yogurt or a bow of Cracklin' Oat Bran for breakfast. I go to class at 8 AM. I have calculus most mornings, except Thursday, which is a comp sci lab. I diligently take notes in calculus. I come back to my room by 9 AM. I dally around on the computer for a while. Then I go to more class. Then I come back and waste more time on the computer, or napping. I go to my final class. Then I go to work, where I hammer out a few dozen lines of code, fix some bugs, whatever. Go back to my room, mess around on the computer, not really producing anything worthwhile. Maybe I play a video game. Maybe I nap. Probably I nap. Maybe I study later in the evening. I might even eat somewhere in there. Then I scramble to finish up some homework, and head to bed for another day of the same.

And little of what I do during the day seems to have any meaning whatsoever. Everything I do seems to be an attempt to expend the least amount of effort possible, as though I am so completely sapped of energy that the slightest effort is impossible.

I feel like I used to spend much more time giving my life meaning. I used to write extensively, which forced me to really think about the world around me, and my experiences. I used to interact with people more regularly. I used to at least read and synthesize information.

This is disappointing, because I strongly feel in making each day worthwhile. I am a strong atheist. My atheism has led me to realize that it is important to make everyday count, because we only get one shot at life. Yet, I feel that I rarely make everyday count. I make very few days count, in fact.

But this post is not about me. The above anecdote was just a lead-in to the real question: Do you make each day count? Do you live so as to give your life meaning? If so, how? How do you feel that your life, or any person's life, can be given meaning? In short, what do you do to make living worthwhile, to use your mental and physical faculties in the most productive way? I'm not asking what the general meaning of life is; I don't intend for the usual answers. I'm interesting in seeing what you as an individual does to give your life meaning each day.

[*mipadi*]

It's certainly not off-topic. In fact, you make a wonderful point--I believe life is all about doing that which brings you joy. If joy is playing guitar in a band, or watching cartoons every morning, or ready trashy romance novels, then by all means go for it. Like I said, you only get one shot at life--might as well make the most of it while it lasts. However, my anecdote was meant to show that I'm not really spending my time doing what I'd like to do; my life is mostly a dull monotony that I am feeling, more and more, is wasted.

Not that I think my life is bad, of course; it's just boring. I have the opportunity to make it more interesting, but I haven't been doing that as of late.

Which brings me round to my earlier point of questioning everyone else on what they do to bring meaning to their lives.

[innovation]

Which brings me round to my earlier point of questioning everyone else on what they do to bring meaning to their lives.

I influence, discuss, explore, think. On the weekends, I observe people on the Metro and eat those pretzels filled with cream cheese and collect quotes to post on my wall and browse Wikipedia. And then I go to Barnes and Noble with my friends, and we look through those huge books with pictures of different countries. We have coffee and talk about school, people, the world, the future.

Then, during the week, I have a full IB curriculum and major extracurricular projects. A lot of people keep telling me to take a break and relax a little because I'm stressing myself out over all this stuff that is causing adversity in my life. They tell me just what you said (paraphrased): "You only live once so take a breather and enjoy your life."

But I enjoy that adversity. It has personal significance. It has opened doors to more opportunity for exploration than I could've ever imagined. It makes my life dynamic. It seems as if life loses its meaning when adversity is gone. Naturally, people want to aspire after something, and when they are granted that something, they just keep on searching.

You know, I bet that I'm one of the few IB juniors at my school who can honestly say that I love my life, despite all the endless work. I'm learning, growing, changing. I can feel it.

[innovation]

edit: sorry, accidentally double-posted.