Crap., . Options

[misskentucky]

I'm starting to think my "best friends" really aren't.

Ok my bffffffff Katie and I have been best friends since 4th grade. I had a hard life before that and she came alone and was my emotional support. She was my best friend who cared. Well then in 6th grade here came along Jordyn and they are basically the same person in different bodies. They even look alike. It's crazy.

Then theres Alex. Me and him have known eachother since like kindergarten. We started being friends in like 6th grade. Then Brian came along. Well So me Jordyn katie Alex Brian are all like a group. ok?

Today I found out they were going to Harry Potter and I said I would go too because I'm bored. Alex said he couldn't get ahold of Brian and he never called me.

Then I called katie to see if she wanted to do something and she said she had to go grocery shopping with her mom. I called later and turns out Katie had left when her mom was shopping so she didn't go. Katie is like the nicest person ever and never lies. Now the movie is over (I know because they have their cells on now) And nobody will answer there phones. Nobodys home.

We have this friend I'll call him Eric. He's super annoying and just argh. So whenever he calls or something we don't answer it. I know its really mean I feel super bad because now I know what it feels like. I just have a sense that they think I'm annoying and are treating me like Eric. I can't imagine my life without Katie, let alone brian alex and jordyn.

I just don't know what to do. I have depression and anxiety and I take prozac but things like this get me so depressed I can't handle it anymore. I've tried cutting myself but that didn't help. I think about suicide a lot. All because of these guys. But I really can't not be friends with them. They are my support. They are good friends when they want to be. And advice CB?