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A Story, An odd sort of love story
Sa-Chan
post Apr 30 2004, 10:43 PM
Post #1


Crying Behind Blind Eyes
****

Group: Member
Posts: 257
Joined: Mar 2004
Member No: 7,967



This'll be slow to begin with and I'll need help in finding a title but I hope you enjoy...




Vague Emotion




Prologue:



She hunched her shoulder and let out a small sigh. Her feelings had been hurt time and time again this week and she was losing it for her sure. She had failed her latest science test, been sent to the office for chewing gum, and now she had found out her boyfriend had taken another girl to prom. How could anything get worse?

She reclined slightly on the couch; punk rock was playing from two different stereos, both turned up as loud as they could be. For some reason noise had always soothed her. She could hear the faint ringing of the phone; it had been going on and on with it's annoying little tone for the last two hours...signaling to her that he was trying to call her again.

She didn't even bother to pick the phone up. What would be the point? He would only grovel, and whine; tell her how much he loved her, missed her...wished she had been there. He would deny that he had fooled around with the girl, he would call the three witnesses, that had seen him and his prom date kiss, liars. The conversation would end in an argument and one of them would hang up on the other...then the tears would start again.

She knew this was how it would end up. They argued so much. She wished they didn't, because deep down she really did love him, but lately she saw no real reason to be with him. He had once made her so happy. She thought back to their first real date. It had been after hours on the beach. She had just laid peacefully in his arms, staring up at the night sky and all her troubles had melted away.

How she longed with all her heart that those times would come back. She wanted so badly to pick up the phone and be comforted by those three words he would utter, 'I love you...'. Even if it was a lie, even if he was only saying that because he needed to be in a relationship and in some sick way he needed her...she wanted to hear him say those words more than anything...

The last song on the track ended leaving her all alone with the loud ringing of the telephone. She tried to block it out. Another memory came back to her. Valentine's day, it had been four days before they had begun going out...four days... She had been his Valentine, they had stayed up all night on the phone together, laughing and talking about nothing and yet everything all at once.

Over those next few days he had hinted heavily at how much he liked her; she had hinted back. Suddenly she let out a soft giggle, it had been the first laugh she had given in a long time. Another memory, the day he asked her out, February 18, she remembered his telling her that he had asked her two bestfriend's permission first. It had been so cute...so kind...

He had by far been her best boyfriend, and she loved him...she truly loved him. Her bestfriend had told her to give her boyfriend a break to talk to him and see what he had to say... Maybe he was right.

She grabbed the phone from the hook quickly.

"H-Hello?" Her voice was a soft quiver, she could hear the tears in her voice, but she tried to remain composed.

"I...didn't think you would pick up," His very voice made her heart leap slightly, and then drop to her stomach.

"I don't know why I did," she replied softly, yet dangerously.

"Don't listen to them...you have to understand...I would never hurt you..." His voice rang loud and clear, and for some reason the very words that were meant to help her...hurt her worse...




Author's Note: Okay, that was the prologue, if you guys like this I'll write Chapter One. It will take place in the future (about two months later). We will find out what happen to the two and how they are doing (as well as find out their names). Also, this is not all a sappy love story it's an adventure that will take place and challenge the heroine's psyche as well as her body..
 
 
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Sa-Chan
post May 13 2004, 05:14 PM
Post #2


Crying Behind Blind Eyes
****

Group: Member
Posts: 257
Joined: Mar 2004
Member No: 7,967



Chapter Seven:


He finally pulled away from Elise, his eyes still gazing into hers, but fully acknowledging that another person was present. He broke the gaze with Elise, and turned to his sister Claire, who although was blushing a slight red color, smiled with complete joy, and clapped her hands.

"So...the lovers have finally come to realize they're lost without eachother?" she questioned.

He merely nodded in returned, but his eyes told Claire what he was thinking. He knew she could read him like a book. They weren't just siblings, they were friends, and had always shared a special bond. He knew what she was thinking, and she knew what he was thinking. Do we tell her?

"Um...Elise," Claire's voice was timid for once, "Lucien and I have something to tell you."

His eyes darted about the room nervously as he felt Elise's hand tighten around his. Elise knew something was wrong, that was obvious. How was he to tell her what it was though? How serious it was? He looked at her, into her deep blue eyes, once again, and he could see the tears building up. He was scaring her.

"E-Elise..." He began, "Do you remember...what happened in the alley...thay day?"

"Y-yes..." her voice cracked as she spoke, and Claire walked to her and wrapped her in a tight hug.

"Do you remember the man I...killed...?" as he spoke he glanced down at his hands, and for a brief instant he saw the blood again, he relived the moment when he became a murdering, and it made him cringe.

Elise merely nodded this time. She knew what was going to be said next, she clinged to Claire, and buried her face in the nook of Claire's neck, crying insanely.

"He was part of a local gang...a...a very important gang. Liberi...is the name of the group...and the head of the gang...is a man named Vega..." his voice stuttered at the name. Elise and himself had always been very open between eachother before their fight, but he had always neglected to tell her one thing, and now was not the time to mention it, "He...he will seek his revenge on the both of us, Elise...and no matter where we run to...he will find us...and he will kill us...the both of us, because to him, his only family...are the members of his gang...he will destroy us...unless we fight back..."

He stood up, giving Claire a meaningful look, before walking out, his hands shoved in his pockets, head turned down. He couldn't bare to look at Elise now...not after this...hearing her cries was more than enough. He shut the door quietly behind him, and slammed his fist into the wall. Then, breaking down completely, he placed his face in his hands...and cried.

He heard the door open gently, and quiet footsteps tap against the wooden floor.

"Father will not have mercy on you...you know that...right...?" Claire's words would forever echo in his mind.


--------


w00t w00t, twists and turns. Anyways, I wrote this very quickly (five to ten minutes) during some spare time at school. I'm terribly sorry if it sucks...but...it was either this or no chapter for awhile.
 

Posts in this topic
Sa-Chan   A Story   Apr 30 2004, 10:43 PM
CJ1   Wow. I wish I could write. Keep it up! As for ...   Apr 30 2004, 11:58 PM
01-supergirl   Wow that story is greatt. awsome writting. =)   May 1 2004, 01:54 AM
hair products   i wanna know what happens now. write!   May 1 2004, 05:07 AM
conster   omg hurry up wit the writing would u!?!?...   May 1 2004, 10:46 AM
Sa-Chan   Oh my god o_O Here I was thinking my writing sucks...   May 1 2004, 11:28 AM
ThePrincessofTKD   wooh!!! revenge?? is this like...KIL...   May 1 2004, 11:40 AM
Sa-Chan   lol, no no no, it's not like Kill Bill ^^() So...   May 1 2004, 11:58 AM
ThePrincessofTKD   QUOTE(Sa-Chan @ May 1 2004, 11:58 AM)lol...   May 1 2004, 12:09 PM
liquidbluac1d   wow nice! I enjoyed it   May 1 2004, 12:22 PM
Sa-Chan   I'll do Chapter Two later today or early tomor...   May 1 2004, 12:30 PM
dani41790   woah ur a gud writer.   May 1 2004, 02:38 PM
Just_Dream   very nice =D maybe we can share stories sometime ^...   May 1 2004, 02:52 PM
DesperateXMeasures   Well hurry up man! xD I'll be waiting....   May 1 2004, 02:53 PM
Stephy110390   WOW!...... dat was good!... i want m...   May 1 2004, 09:05 PM
b3atr3d   Whoaa, dude.. awesome writing. keep it up. :)   May 1 2004, 09:18 PM
conster   publish it loll its really good   May 2 2004, 12:05 AM
Sa-Chan   Alright, here's the next chapter guys! ^_...   May 2 2004, 02:10 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   ooh!!! i felt like crying myself...   May 2 2004, 02:17 PM
Sa-Chan   As of now there is no certain number of chapters, ...   May 2 2004, 02:19 PM
silver rain   Aw, that was so sad. You're a good writer. Ooh...   May 2 2004, 02:28 PM
perdyperdybirdy   AH your a good writer! write more! lol   May 2 2004, 02:32 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   QUOTE(Sa-Chan @ May 2 2004, 2:19 PM)As o...   May 2 2004, 03:23 PM
orlando_bloom_luva   ohhh this is a nice story=] cant wait til the next...   May 2 2004, 04:19 PM
NiteSerpent   awww, I wish you already put up chapter 3 and 4 an...   May 2 2004, 08:15 PM
huihead   wow.. that's so good. you're so talented =...   May 2 2004, 10:54 PM
Sa-Chan   Okay, I just wanted to go ahead and say as I have ...   May 3 2004, 07:17 AM
kedralynn   nooooooooo!! post the rest of the story...   May 3 2004, 11:13 AM
Sa-Chan   Okay guys! Here's the next Chapter, it may...   May 3 2004, 05:54 PM
DesperateXMeasures   Can't wait for the next chapter!   May 3 2004, 05:57 PM
NiteSerpent   I just cried out all my tears on another story, bu...   May 3 2004, 07:01 PM
kedralynn   amazing, gahh dont take so long in writng it!   May 3 2004, 07:21 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   the violence was short... haha...SUCH PASSION...   May 3 2004, 08:53 PM
Sa-Chan   *giggles* I knew someone was gonna say that, but t...   May 3 2004, 09:37 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   i understand.. even if you say it`s not a s...   May 3 2004, 09:42 PM
hawyngurlie8o8   I love dis story!! Keep writin' GHURL...   May 3 2004, 10:37 PM
Sa-Chan   Here's another Chapter... I detailed this more...   May 4 2004, 07:54 PM
[X]poised   you are SUCH a good writer!!! i wanna ...   May 4 2004, 08:03 PM
conster   aww......... come on!! keep writing i wann...   May 4 2004, 08:04 PM
swe3tascandie   that stories awesome. you should continue it!   May 4 2004, 08:44 PM
midnite   *blows nose* tissues anyone?   May 4 2004, 09:21 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   as always..wonderfully done! good enough ...   May 4 2004, 09:43 PM
Sa-Chan   Guys, I'm sorry ;-; But there's a very def...   May 5 2004, 03:16 PM
hawyngurlie8o8   Keep on writing, UR DA BEST GHURL!!!   May 5 2004, 03:24 PM
LiL KwAyZee PuNk   aww okies alwaiiZ a nex tyi0me !! u da BES...   May 5 2004, 04:09 PM
susan is sober   awww i love that story!!!!!...   May 5 2004, 09:08 PM
Sa-Chan   Okay guys, since I didn't give ya'll a Cha...   May 5 2004, 09:27 PM
PunkRocker315   WOW !! that was so amazing..i loved it..y...   May 5 2004, 10:32 PM
Sa-Chan   Okay guys, I have real bad writer's block, but...   May 6 2004, 04:16 PM
Nehima   i'm really loving your writing   May 6 2004, 05:16 PM
UrBBaNgirl   that's awesome....i'm hanging on the edge ...   May 6 2004, 07:01 PM
Sa-Chan   Okay, guys, I've finally figured something out...   May 6 2004, 07:03 PM
Nehima   don't tell me you're gonna kill them off, ...   May 6 2004, 07:09 PM
actingchick837   ilove this stoey u are a great writter you need to...   May 6 2004, 07:10 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   i love that pic!!!soooooo sweet.. k...   May 6 2004, 07:28 PM
Gypsy Eyes   amazing, as usual. DAMNIT!!! you are l...   May 7 2004, 03:28 PM
Sa-Chan   Well...I'm back. Sadly, I do not have a Chapte...   May 7 2004, 03:41 PM
silver rain   aww, i can't wait to read the next chapter- yo...   May 7 2004, 04:05 PM
xEoreMehttax   aghhhhhh...writer's block sucks...i'm in o...   May 8 2004, 12:43 PM
PunkRocker315   dang i love this story its so0o good..writers bloc...   May 8 2004, 07:08 PM
xXgWenZilLaXx   awww thats such a good story...wish i could write...   May 9 2004, 07:32 PM
x_angawhomps   Holy crap, woman. You're good. You're real...   May 9 2004, 07:48 PM
shortie09   that`s some pretty creative writing...hope you...   May 9 2004, 09:58 PM
Sa-Chan   Ooooh! Guys I'm so sorry I didn't post...   May 10 2004, 03:26 PM
Sa-Chan   Okay guys! I have time to post a Chapter! ...   May 10 2004, 04:39 PM
LiL KwAyZee PuNk   WAA UR SUCH A GOOD WRITER !! MORE MORE MOR...   May 10 2004, 06:48 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   haha..i had to reread chapter 5 to remember what h...   May 10 2004, 07:15 PM
Gypsy Eyes   gahhh hurry up with the next chapter!!   May 10 2004, 07:35 PM
PunkRocker315   dang i love this story..its so0o0o00o0o good..hurr...   May 13 2004, 01:42 PM
sunnysidedown828   too much readin 4 me :]   May 13 2004, 02:22 PM
Sa-Chan   Chapter Seven: He finally pulled away from Elis...   May 13 2004, 05:14 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   my goodness...when you thought it was going to be ...   May 13 2004, 05:18 PM
UrBBaNgirl   that's really good! can't wait to read...   May 13 2004, 07:18 PM
Sa-Chan   Oh! Good job urbbangirl! I was wondering i...   May 13 2004, 07:46 PM
PunkRocker315   it juss keeps gettin better n better..ilove it..an...   May 14 2004, 03:18 AM
Gypsy Eyes   it does keep getting better and better. gahhh yo...   May 14 2004, 02:56 PM
sweetnlilly   *woah* ur stry is sooooooooooo good. u shud post ...   May 14 2004, 10:49 PM
Sa-Chan   In this chapter anything in italics is a flashback...   May 20 2004, 09:50 AM
ThePrincessofTKD   ...awww...what a cute chapter... but in real life...   May 20 2004, 04:30 PM
juliar   QUOTE(ThePrincessofTKD @ May 20 2004, 4:30 PM...   May 20 2004, 05:58 PM
Sa-Chan   Don't worry, I'll explain it all ^^ And I ...   May 20 2004, 07:17 PM
FlyingFries   really nice story   May 20 2004, 07:32 PM
PunkRocker315   what one of ur worst ones?? how can that be when e...   May 20 2004, 09:52 PM
EmeraldKnight   QUOTEDon't worry, I'll explain it all ^^ A...   May 20 2004, 10:14 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   i know a way she could publish it!!! ...   May 21 2004, 07:09 AM
Sa-Chan   I'm not a very good artist...I would give ya...   May 21 2004, 01:37 PM
shortie09   QUOTE(ThePrincessofTKD @ May 20 2004, 4:30 PM...   May 21 2004, 10:52 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   QUOTE(Sa-Chan @ May 21 2004, 1:37 PM)I...   May 21 2004, 10:57 PM
Sa-Chan   Okay, guys, still no chapter, but I'm afraid t...   May 22 2004, 11:22 AM
juliar   QUOTE(Sa-Chan @ May 22 2004, 11:22 AM)Ok...   May 23 2004, 09:13 AM
Sa-Chan   Chapter Nine: He had been slightly relaxed by he...   May 24 2004, 02:03 PM
EmeraldKnight   Wow... absolutely stunning... very suspenseful... ...   May 24 2004, 04:53 PM
ThePrincessofTKD   how devastating..and what a twist to the story..   May 24 2004, 05:52 PM
ComradeRed   Alternate Epilogue -- If this were in Soviet Russi...   May 24 2004, 06:50 PM
Sa-Chan   QUOTE(ComradeRed @ May 24 2004, 6:50 PM)Alter...   May 24 2004, 08:46 PM
PunkRocker315   wow i cant believe that vega was his dad!...   May 25 2004, 04:27 PM
angel-roh   hmm... kinda got lost but newais the first post, ...   May 25 2004, 08:06 PM
ComradeRed   QUOTE(anqel_r0h @ May 25 2004, 8:06 PM)hmm......   May 25 2004, 08:10 PM
Sa-Chan   QUOTE(ComradeRed @ May 25 2004, 8:10 PM)There...   May 26 2004, 10:36 AM
ComradeRed   QUOTE(Sa-Chan @ May 26 2004, 10:36 AM)Mm...   May 26 2004, 11:05 AM
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