this isn't working Options

[*tweeak*]

It seems that lately, all of my friends have been really happy. All coupling up and stuff, generally being happy.

And then there's me.

Off, over there, metaphorically far away from everyone. And I'm glad they're happy- or, at least should be- and I've done a remarkably good job of taking it in stride and remaining at least superficially optimistic, because I know whining wouldn't help anything. And I love some of my friends, and I'm weening myself off the ones who annoy me again, but practically everyone is going out with someone, and I don't know, maybe it's a coincidence, but it seems to change the way some of them act around me. I;m the third wheel for a couple of my friends and they don't seem to mind, so I don't either until I actually think about it. But still it seems immensely unfair they should be happier. I'm not one of those people who won't let themselves be happy, really I'm not, and so I manage to be pretty contented. And yet there's this large void that needs filling, no matter how much I try to convince myself otherwise.

I was doing just fine despite the endless :D :D :D :D s that appear in some peoples' xangas (if they happen again, I swear I'm going to snap) until a friend mentioned having a party tonight if anyone wasn't going to another party. I said I didn't know the other person was having one, so I'd like to go. Then the other guy replied and said he didn't want everyone to know, but never extended the invitation to me. Then the other party never happened because everyone went there and now they're all saying how great it was. And I was here. Well, great. Thanks a lot. Maybe if my friends didn't travel in herds this wouldn't suck so much, but I really don't appreciate being blatanly discluded even if the person whose paty it was doesn't like me very much. He actually subscribed to and has been commenting on my xanga, so I thought he was starting to tolerate me, but apparently not so much. Bah.

Well, so yes, I just had to ponder the way I still am not nearly as much a part of the social order of things as I thought.

[jsmooth4ever]

Tweeak I knew that someday I was going to meet you sooner or later what you are going through is a little bit of envy and wanting to be accepted I been in situations where I was the third wheel but I was happy as long as they were happy I know everyone around you is all lovey dovy and it can make you a little bitter cause your not lovey dove thats messed up that they didnt tag you along.

But you didn't like the host anyway so I guess its a lose-win situation I know what it is like to watch everyone around me fall in love and being the only one without people doing double dates and going to the movies I don't think they mean to exclude you from anything I think they just thinking oh im a couple so lets take another couple.

Trust me you don't need to be around 2x the I love you more trash cause it makes you wish you had someone lonely if you will just continue doing you it will get better until the next few holidays humble yourself I am not saying don't chill with your friends but I am saying find something that makes you happy like something that takes your mind off of the situation.