how to spot a..., punk/emo/indie/screamo Options

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This was in the paper
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Is there and emo in your house?



How to spot an "emo":

Wardrobe musts: Some sort of "cause bracelet." Shows they care.
Hair: Can be short or long, must be intentionally mussed. The just-got-off-a-roller-coaster look.
On their feet: Barefoot's best; shows they're "earthy," in touch with their feelings. Emo is, after all, short for "emotional." Sneakers are cool, too, like DVS.
Current emo ringleader: Death Cab for Cutie, whose forthcoming album, Plans, is one of this year's most anticipated releases.
They also ♥: Dashboard Confessional, Bright Eyes, the Starting Line, Jimmy Eat World, the Rocket Summer, Mae, the Promise Ring, the Postal Service - the band, not the people who lose your mail all the time. Newmos (newcomer emos) can fool everyone into believing they're longtime emos by also namedropping Unwound and Sunny Day Real Estate, emo pioneers.
Other sure signs: Holding a guitar,. Emos are supposed to be very much in touch with their emotions - and they're not afraid to sing about them. Broken heart necessary.


How to spot a "punk":

Wardrobe musts: jeans, ripped or not. Something hanging from pocket - bandana, wallet chain.
Hair: Not a big deal anymore. Mohawks are out. Colored hair's boring. Punk is such a part of pop culture now, normal's natural. You may have a punk kid living at your house and you DON'T EVEN KNOW IT.
On their feet: Vans sneakers or Skecher-like, tough-looking work shoes. BUT THEY CANNOT BE SKECHERS. That's too brand-namey.
Current punk ringleader: After a period of being not-so-hip, Green Day's cool again, thanks to their very fine, spit-in-the-face-of-politics CD, American Idiot.
They also ♥: Alkaline Trio, New Found Glory, Yellowcard, Fall Out Boy, the Clash, an (and every) band that has played the Warped Tour.
Other sure signs: Facial piercings and tattoos are the obvious signs, but because that'll get kids kicked out of school, look for concert T-shirts, left-of-center accessories and iPods of all colors, MBs and gigs. Bad attitueds, arrest warrants and the whole safety-pinks-through-the-nose thing are more over than Sum 41.


How to spot a "screamo":

Wardrobe musts: Concert T-shirts, not ones bought at the mall. Eyeline, definitely - both guys and girls.
Hair: Same messy-is-good ethos as emos, but messier. May have to spend a few more minutes slopping it around.
On their feet: Whatever; they're not picky.
Current screamo ringleader: Hawthorne Heights, coming soon to a set of earplugs near you.
They also ♥: Terminal, Thrice, the Used, Posion the Well, Thursday, Underoath - basically, emo bands that scream a lot.
Other sure signs: Edgier attitude. Maybe black nail polish to go along with the eyeliner. Screamos are a little more pessimistic than emos, but just as in touch with their feelings. But, really, can't we all just scream along?


How to spot an "indie":

Wardrobe musts: Collared shirts (polo shirts, but not Polo shirts), tucked in or left out. Slim pants or clean jeans - no holes. Vintage jacket - or new, vintage-looking jacket. Need to look like they shot at second-hand stores, even if they don't.
Hair: Short, a little messy but still stylish. Thing GQ crossed with Spin.
On their feet: Either thrift-store-bought/kinda-scruffy dress shoes or retail store-bought sneakers.
Current indie ringleaders: Sufjan Steens, a singer/songwriter who plans to release one CD for every single US state. Indie kids, start saving your money now.
They also ♥: Modest Mouse, the Decemberists, Bloc Party, Arcade Fire, Kings of Leon, Spoon, Shout Out Louds, Cursive, Architecture in Helsinki.
Other sure signs: Should be snobby about music, like guys in High Fidelity. Must own iPod, but not the Shuffle or the Mini but the one that costs $400 or whatever. Know of bands no one else has ever heard of - and probably never will.

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I love how they thought they knew enough of what they were talking about to publish this.

[..:loveee.NuTTii]

Well that was fun to read...