shallow people, i hate it - do you? Options

[timeflies51]

Personally, I can't help but cringe whenever I hear that someone *likes another person only for their looks and not for their personality or who they truly are. Sure, it's okay to think somebody is good-looking, but I think it's ridiculous for that to be the only reason someone would like them. It also annoys me when someone says, "I like them sooooooo much" and they've never or barely even talked to the person. (*Note: When I say "like" I mean as in a crush, or like-like, or whatever, not just saying, "Oh, s/he's hot.")

I just recently went to a sleepaway summer camp where relationships were the big thing. (As they say, "Jew camp is for lovers.") I could never keep track of who was going out with who and who broke up with who and who was making out/hooking up with who. I even had a friend who hooked up with a different guy every night, four nights in a row. I was deathly pissed at her, because that is just...sickening! What can I say? It's shallow. And it annoys me.

Usually I find that I begin to like someone after I really get to know them and have talked with them a lot - a taste of their personality. Looks can help, I suppose, as it's human nature to be attracted, but I think in a partner looks are a but a bonus.

I know I can't control the fact that people are like this, but does anyone share the same opinion?

[technicolour]

^ Yea. He's a jerk. We've known that.

Seriously, there are those people and it sucks. Frankly, it's human nature to be assholes. It sucks, but, unfortunately there's too many in the world to do anything about them.

[*mipadi*]

^ Yea. He's a jerk. We've known that.

Seriously, there are those people and it sucks. Frankly, it's human nature to be assholes. It sucks, but, unfortunately there's too many in the world to do anything about them.

Oh, come now, let's be honest--no one is going to date someone they find ugly.

Now, of course, people have widely varied views of what is attractive. Someone I might find positively ugly, another might find very nice looking. And I think personality does play a part; there have been some girls I have met that I thought, "Meh, she's okay, nothing spectacular," then got to know them, found out they were really, really cool, took a second look, and thought, "Hey, she actually is kind of cute." Sometimes you don't notice how nice a person looks until you know them well, and getting to know a person well is more dependent on personality than looks. But the notion that a person will completely disregard looks and date someone based purely on personality, even if they find that person ugly, is, to me, absurd.

[technicolour]

Oh, come now, let's be honest--no one is going to date someone they find ugly.

Now, of course, people have widely varied views of what is attractive. Someone I might find positively ugly, another might find very nice looking. And I think personality does play a part; there have been some girls I have met that I thought, "Meh, she's okay, nothing spectacular," then got to know them, found out they were really, really cool, took a second look, and thought, "Hey, she actually is kind of cute." Sometimes you don't notice how nice a person looks until you know them well, and getting to know a person well is more dependent on personality than looks. But the notion that a person will completely disregard looks and date someone based purely on personality, even if they find that person ugly, is, to me, absurd.

You seriously like bashing me.

I dont go out with guys purely based on looks. No i get to know them first, but there are guys that'll just say, oh she's hot I want that. And that really, well, it's not nice.

The shallowness in people will eventually come around and bite them back in the butt.

[*mipadi*]

You seriously like bashing me.

Bashing you? Look, honey, I'm disagreeing with you, not bashing you. You only choose to take it personally. Bashing you would be attacking you personally, not your argument.

I just find it very hard to believe that anyone, including me or you, will go out with someone they find ugly. Now, that does not mean that a person goes out with the most attractive person they can, irregardless of personality; personality plays a big factor in relationships (or should, anyway). Note that I am not saying you or I, or anyone else, dates people based solely on physical beauty; but I also doubt that you or I or anyone else would describe our partners, past present and future, as "ugly". And as noted, personality can help make a person more attractive; but I seriously do not think that that a person will go out with someone they find unattractive. Again, physical attractiveness is not black and white; something one person finds attractive, another may find completely repulsive; but I think anyone in a relationship generally finds their partner attractive. If you can find someone who thinks their boyfriend or girlfriend is ugly, I'd be very surprised.

Now, someone going out with someone solely based on appearance, no matter how foul their personality, is shallow; but that's a different point entirely.