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should i tell her?
Chyn020
post May 14 2005, 01:04 PM
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hey you guys.
needless to say.. I'm new at this. so if this topic is old, I'm very sorry but I just really need advice! _unsure.gif

ok well.. there is this boy Carlos. wub.gif I really like him and everything. He's such a sweetie and he's so adorable! He asked me out yesterday.. but there is one problem.. My Mom! Im not allowed to have a boyfriend! Yes i know.. we're in the year 2005! But My mom is more of an old-fashioned hispanic mother who over-protects her children and has very strict rules!
Don't get me wrong. Its my mom and everything.. but I really like Carlos!
I have asked her before if I could have a boyfriend.. but she starts to lecture me and say "NO!"

Should I talk to her about it.. or just do it behind her back? Her trust is really important to me, but i dont think she would ever understand! cry.gif
Like i said... I really really like him!

I would really appreciate any advice or comments or if anyone has had a similar problem.. what did you do? _smile.gif
 
 
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Just_Dream
post May 14 2005, 04:07 PM
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First off, there are still plenty of over-protective parents. Trust me, I should know. I'm 17 and my mom still tells me that I can't date guys until I'm out of college (That might take 8+ years. mellow.gif ) or that I can't get married until I'm 25+ years old. Realize that your mother has her best interest at heart. You don't want to get into a situation that you might regret.

Anyway, about this whole situation... Well if you don't want to date Carlos behind your mother's back, don't do it. I noticed that you're 15.. No need to rush into something so quickly. I'm in a relationship right now and I've been able to keep it from my mother and father for over 2 years (I'm with my bf for 2 years and 5+ months happy.gif )... I hate lying to my mother about this because she's told me countless times to not talk to boys and stuff.

What you COULD do is tell your mother.. BUT if she gets angry and tells you know, then you COULD date him behind her back... BUT there's always OPTION C. Not many people choose Option C. Only those who really WOULD wait for eac other and care about each other a lot, would action choose option C. Option C is where you tell Carlos that you just want to be best friends with him now because your mother doesn't want you to date; ask him to wait for you, that when you're allowed to date, he should ask you out. Tell him that you do like him and that you want date him, but you don't want to date him behind her back. Introduce Carlos to your mother (IF she would allow it), that way your mother might approve of him and you two could hang out more. You two could build a stronger bond and eventually your mother might approve. :]
 

Posts in this topic
Chyn020   should i tell her?   May 14 2005, 01:04 PM
angel_revelation   i think it would be best to respect your mom's...   May 14 2005, 01:53 PM
Just_Dream   First off, there are still plenty of over-protecti...   May 14 2005, 04:07 PM
Kounouri   i agree .. try telling your mom that you like a bo...   May 14 2005, 04:13 PM
sk8ter4life750   QUOTE(Kounouri @ May 14 2005, 5:13 PM)i agree...   May 14 2005, 08:08 PM
aera   my parents are over-protective too... but a lot of...   May 14 2005, 04:18 PM
helenxxx   I would keep it from my mom. Apparently me and my ...   May 14 2005, 04:21 PM
Chyn020   omg! thank you guys so much! im still not ...   May 14 2005, 04:55 PM
pinayprincess   i would do it behind her baCK.... my mom is the sa...   May 14 2005, 06:28 PM
iNyCxShoRT   What she doesnt know can't hurt her p_p;;   May 14 2005, 07:32 PM
Shattered_Hope   If you don't feel comfortable going behind you...   May 15 2005, 10:03 PM
SimplicityGirl   Well...if you feel comfortable dating behind your ...   May 15 2005, 10:34 PM
babycarrot   hmm. question! how old are ya?   May 16 2005, 03:27 AM
Chyn020   QUOTE(babycarrot @ May 16 2005, 3:27 AM)hmm. ...   May 16 2005, 08:46 PM
x3__iGiVEup   well, in my opinion, you could go behind her back....   May 16 2005, 08:19 PM
Shortiiex   just have fun with him....she has to RESPECT YOUR ...   May 17 2005, 09:45 PM
jiaho93   OMG, I have the exact same problem!! Bleg...   May 17 2005, 10:03 PM
xlaydee_v   lols. how old are you? i mean.. why shouldn't ...   May 17 2005, 10:03 PM
tmauze   don't risk getting into trouble with your mom....   May 17 2005, 10:49 PM
separatewings   I honestly, would go behind my parent's back. ...   May 17 2005, 11:50 PM
enyceXaddiction   GO OUT WITH HIM. i do my parents had told me a TRI...   May 18 2005, 06:28 PM
Chyn020   QUOTE(enyceXaddiction @ May 18 2005, 6:28 PM)...   May 20 2005, 06:17 PM
secrets-out   tell her, I'm also "not suppose to date...   May 20 2005, 09:28 PM
nothingless   keep it secret. always fun.   May 21 2005, 10:26 AM


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