createBlog Diary, version 4 |
createBlog Diary, version 4 |
*Azarel* |
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Originally started by fathin_felix. Great idea.
Version2 Version3 Old one was 22 pages. Diary? Self-explanitory? I think so. Don't post in here solely to comment on someone else's day.. you can quote them, but don't make that your post. ----- Dear createBlog Diary, I suppose it's been a long while since I've really written anything. I still can't find the inspiration I once had. Just, sometimes, I miss writing. Makes me feel empty, yanno? Time to ramble on some more. Last night, I felt utterly tired, for no reason. I mean, I'm on freaking spring break, I shouldn't feel tired of anything, really. But I realized I was. I was sitting here on the computer, with nothing to do, nobody to talk to, nothing to relate to. I hated that feeling of utter.. boredom. I still don't know why. I guess I still haven't grown out of the phase where I can't see past the monotony of life. It's almost over though, high school, I mean. More than halfway. And I can't believe break is more than half over already too. It used to be that the days would drag by, but already, it's Thursday, and I have yet to accomplish anything. Party tomorrow night at Jenn's, and I kind of want to go. At the same time though, I don't. I guess I'm worn out at the moment. There's nobody to call late at night anymore. People are in school, they have work, whatever. I don't like keeping people up if they have things to do the next day-- it makes me feel bad. And I've been waking up so late nowadays. It makes me feel like a lazy pig. I dunno. I suppose it's just me. Is all, for now. Until next time. -Me. |
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![]() dakishimetainoni... ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,322 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 75,318 ![]() |
dear createBlog diary,
i'm not sure why i'm writing but i don't know...it's like i thought i hade life figured out, or at least had an outline but so many things freak me out...what if johnny's plan falls through...? i wouldn't mind working a 9-5 job, as long as it puts money in the bank and provides us with food and a place to stay...but johnny wouldn't want me to work... i'm afraid of being pregnant...i might be but i'm not sure...the condom may have leaked...i did the math, if i really am, i'll give birth before my 18th birthday. we're supposed to get up and go when i'm 18 because by then he'll be 18 too. this will mess everything up, i pray to god i am not pregnant, i would never want to have a child out of wedlock...and have our future ripped away from us. lord knows i'd love to bear johnny's children but just not now... i regret quitting piano so many years ago...i know you shouldn't regret whatever you did because that makes you who you are, but i don't think that applies here. in music class, i appreciate the piano more...i wish i still had one all for myself...the piano is such a beautiful instrument... who am i anymore? i thought i was growing up but after all this, i'm back to who i was 7 years ago...a confused little girl...i hate how everything is so complicated i love johnny, he's so sweet to me i love him so much. things in our relationship seem to be looking up, heh our 1 year anniversary is 100 days from now...and i'm freaking out...i don't know what to get him or what to wear. i've had a dress i planned to wear on our anniversary but i'm having second thoughts on it... ![]() ha, i thought of a new confession, i love that paris hilton song...i wish i could find a better version of it back to tahoma i go...i try to evolve but i always return to my roots ![]() much love, M.L. x3 |
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