createBlog Diary, version 4 Options

[*Azarel*]

Originally started by fathin_felix. Great idea.

Version2
Version3

Old one was 22 pages. Diary? Self-explanitory? I think so. Don't post in here solely to comment on someone else's day.. you can quote them, but don't make that your post.

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Dear createBlog Diary,
I suppose it's been a long while since I've really written anything. I still can't find the inspiration I once had. Just, sometimes, I miss writing. Makes me feel empty, yanno? Time to ramble on some more.

Last night, I felt utterly tired, for no reason. I mean, I'm on freaking spring break, I shouldn't feel tired of anything, really. But I realized I was. I was sitting here on the computer, with nothing to do, nobody to talk to, nothing to relate to. I hated that feeling of utter.. boredom. I still don't know why. I guess I still haven't grown out of the phase where I can't see past the monotony of life. It's almost over though, high school, I mean. More than halfway.

And I can't believe break is more than half over already too. It used to be that the days would drag by, but already, it's Thursday, and I have yet to accomplish anything. Party tomorrow night at Jenn's, and I kind of want to go. At the same time though, I don't. I guess I'm worn out at the moment.

There's nobody to call late at night anymore. People are in school, they have work, whatever. I don't like keeping people up if they have things to do the next day-- it makes me feel bad. And I've been waking up so late nowadays. It makes me feel like a lazy pig. I dunno. I suppose it's just me. Is all, for now. Until next time.
-Me.

[*Azarel*]

Dear createBlog diary,

Not even a day, and I'm writing in here already. Just need somewhere to let loose, and I suppose it's here. Honestly, it's nothing though-- I'm just lonely. Ten thirty-six at night, I should be on the phone or sleeping; instead, I'm sitting here, pouting. There's no one I'd rather be talking to right now. Last night, I called up Christina and Eve, and I simply don't feel like doing it again tonight.

Only two nights since I last talked to Justin, and I miss him already, so much. I love the sound of his voice. I love talking to him. I love everything about him. God, he's so perfect. Two weeks until he moves out--only a little more until he visits. I know he needs his sleep, I know he works and has school, I know he has a life outside of me, but.. I want to be a bigger part of it. I guess I'll have to wait--just a little longer.

我好想他。

And now I'm bitter. We were just talking about birthdays, to some degree. My parents didn't even remember mine. I thought I was okay with it. I mean, I really thought I was, but the more I think about it, the more I realize, it was my sweet sixteen that they forgot. They've thought that I've been sixteen for the past two years. Sure, I thought I had a wonderful day at school that day, people remembered, but it was Jennster mainly. That girl, I don't know what I'd do without her, but she has so many other people there for her too. I'm not one to go around like her, making friends everywhere. I've too much anger, too much hatred. It was all her though, the balloons, the starbucks, the recognition. Nobody else had any idea. Not even my very parents. It's sad, really. Sometimes all I want is to be remembered, maybe even appreciated. It's too much to ask for.

-Me.

p.s. I'm out of food in my room, and for some inexplicable reason, I'm starving not even three hours after I ate dinner. Sigh. Good night.

-- I really don't mean to complain. It just comes out that way whenever I write in here. :\