scared of commitment, is anyone else sacred of committing? Options

[gohomejes]

i think i'm relationship retarded. no really guys.

is anyone here scared of commitment? or relationships?

i think i sort of am. i have met this wonderful guy over a year ago. we were together for a year..we broke up about a month ago b/c i said i couldn't do it anymore. i really loved him..love him, still do..like i am honestly hurting right now. i have been but i have just filled up my days so i dont have time to think about it. he cares so much for me..he loves me so much.

gosh..there were days we'd talk like 16 hours at a time. but you know..i like..being free? like i enjoy just going and reading a book or watching tv by MYSELF. just having alone time..i enjoy being by myself. he got annoyed with that b/c lately we have both been busy..mainly me and i did those times when we "could have been together" i like just going out with friends and not telling him everything i'm done..i like going out with my family..etc. just not having to tell him everything i am doing..when i'm doing it..with who..him getting upset if i talk about some guy joking around with me.

if something is wrong i dont like to talk about it RIGHT AWAY i want to have some time to just THINK and let it sink in. that drove him up the wall b/c he rather me tell him right away.

i wish i could be in a relationship where i could still love them but then not have to tell them every single thing and spend every single moment of my free time with them. does that mean i dont love the person? i dont think it does. now it sounds like i only want a person around when they are convenient. not true. ANYDAY i rather listen to J tell me whats wrong them me talking. i just enjoy listening and helping rather then burdening others with my crap.

so am i afraid of commitment? relationships? i really dont know. can anyone..sort of relate here? at all? i feel so stupid ;/

[Chii]

i don't think you're scared of committment, you just don't want to completely open up to someone or have to explain your comings and goings, it's perfectly natural

it doesn't mean that you don't love him, you do, it's just that he doesn't need to know when you piss or eat and etc

people need their freedom, anyone would agree that it sucks to be with the same person everyday, no matter how much you love them and how much they mean to you...sometimes it just gets boring, other things out there are more exciting. you're experiencing new things now, you'll find out what you want in life sooner or later, maybe he isn't the one and he was just there to help you realize it