scared of commitment, is anyone else sacred of committing? Options

[gohomejes]

i think i'm relationship retarded. no really guys.

is anyone here scared of commitment? or relationships?

i think i sort of am. i have met this wonderful guy over a year ago. we were together for a year..we broke up about a month ago b/c i said i couldn't do it anymore. i really loved him..love him, still do..like i am honestly hurting right now. i have been but i have just filled up my days so i dont have time to think about it. he cares so much for me..he loves me so much.

gosh..there were days we'd talk like 16 hours at a time. but you know..i like..being free? like i enjoy just going and reading a book or watching tv by MYSELF. just having alone time..i enjoy being by myself. he got annoyed with that b/c lately we have both been busy..mainly me and i did those times when we "could have been together" i like just going out with friends and not telling him everything i'm done..i like going out with my family..etc. just not having to tell him everything i am doing..when i'm doing it..with who..him getting upset if i talk about some guy joking around with me.

if something is wrong i dont like to talk about it RIGHT AWAY i want to have some time to just THINK and let it sink in. that drove him up the wall b/c he rather me tell him right away.

i wish i could be in a relationship where i could still love them but then not have to tell them every single thing and spend every single moment of my free time with them. does that mean i dont love the person? i dont think it does. now it sounds like i only want a person around when they are convenient. not true. ANYDAY i rather listen to J tell me whats wrong them me talking. i just enjoy listening and helping rather then burdening others with my crap.

so am i afraid of commitment? relationships? i really dont know. can anyone..sort of relate here? at all? i feel so stupid ;/

[urbanychic]

it's definitly possible that you are afraid of commitment. it's a whole new world for you, despite if you were together for a few months or a few years. Just take your time ... think things out before rushing into anything new. Maybe talk to your guy about your insecurities and how maybe he can give you a couple days or hours during the week that is all to yourself. Where he doesn't call your during certain times unless you call him and you can do your own thing during those certain times as well as he. That way, you still feel that you are doing things on your own and he's not always being there behind your shoulders.