my ex... Options

[Chii]

you never know the value of something until it's lost..
and now i realize.. how much you meant to me.. now that you're gone..
i wish i could turn back time.. and fix my mistakes..
i'm sorry...

that is my ex's away message and i know it's about me because he has said those things to me...it's scaring me...

awhile ago we started talking again then out of the blue he blocked me. i just noticed that he unblocked me. when we were talking before, he told me it took him a year to get over me...and i don't think he's completely over me yet, even though it's been almost 3 years. i like talking to him because i have all these weird questions and he knows everything, i just don't want him to be so sad...

when we talked a week ago, i guess it reminded him of us...of our relationship. our relationship lasted 8 months and he was my first boyfriend and i was his first girlfriend, i broke up with him because he was too clingy and wanted to see me all the time, plus i was only 14, i was young and didn't want to be tied down.

i have a boyfriend now who i love so much...it's like i want to be friends with my ex because he's a great person...but at the same time, it hurts him. i hate hurting people...i don't know what i should do...the obvious answer would be to leave him alone but i don't want him to remember me and be hurt i want him to move on...

[Just_Dream]

It's always tough, with the firsts' and yea... I know that my first relationship was sort of.. BLAH. I'll tell you how I feel about this situation, but my words could mean nothing to you as I've never been through this predicament.

Yes, like stephinika stated, it would help more if you actually told him... None of this internet stuff. Tell him how you truly feel about this ordeal, that you don't feel the same way he does. Admit to him that you do think of him, since you do want to still hold some kind of relationship with him in the form of friendship. But tell him that you've moved on and that you have someone that you're deeply in love with and given your heart to.

Tell me, do you believe that things happen for a reason? Do you believe that people go through different relationships and experiences in love, only to find out that it will sooner or later lead to "the one," the one that is truly meant for you? Past relationships will help find "the one." Do you believe in that possibilty?

If you do believe in that, tell him that things happen for a reason, that you probably aren't "the one" who he is meant to be with. Tell him that there's so many wonderful people out there, that he should try to move on... It may take some time, but it's best that he does. Sure, it will hurt him deep in his heart, but he must realize that you don't feel the same as you did in the past. It's been three years.

And anyway, you broke up with him because he was clingy? Don't you realize that there are so many people who have to deal with long distance relationships? If only you truly knew how it feels to go through every day, knowing that the one you love is at least a thousand miles away from you. Yea, in my past relationships I felt tied down and my second boyfriend was clingy, but I was luckier than others because I got to see him every day, while other couples went to separate schools and it was way tougher. I regret my decisions in the past, but I can't change what happened. But remember just how lucky you truly were, to have someone to love and be with you. I'd rather see someone every day than seeing them once a month. I'm NOT saying long distance relationships don't work (They DO WORK!), but that you should feel lucky, that is all. I'm glad that I get to see my current boyfriend every day... If I don't see him for more than 3 days, I start to get clingy, lonely, etc. I'm so acustomed to having him around that I'd miss him too much if I didn't see him for a week.